I can't think of fun titles anymore

What a fantastic Thanksgiving I had! I had my doubts at how things were going to go, but all turned out well, as it always does.

Last Monday I was so sick, I couldn't do anything. I got a stomach bug or something and couldn't even get myself out of bed. I was quite pathetic. I also tried to make round two of the Swiss bread and failed miserably. Beginners luck I guess. I accidentally killed the yeast, so it didn't rise at all. It was also quite pathetic and I was very sad about the whole thing. Thankfully, Tuesday I was able to pull it together, saw some old deli friends and made it up to North Carolina without any problems.

And in North Carolina is where the Thanksgiving insanity began. My family is always insane and this year was no different. It's always a blast, of course and there is always something ridiculous going on with 25 people running around in one house. And, of course, SO much food. We had two turkeys, one of which was 25 pounds and I never even saw the second one, it was gone before I had finished my mashed potatoes. There were about 35 people at actual Thanksgiving lunch, so it's no wonder everything disappeared so quickly.

Friday I tried again with the Swiss bread and was successful this time! There was only one teeny tiny little hiccup. Instead of three cups of milk, I added six because I thought the measuring cup I was using was for one cup when it was really for two. That's what I get for not actually looking at the writing. But it turned out for the best because I just doubled everything and made four loaves and they were all gone within an hour. Thank goodness for my fatty family!

I am so tired and this post is so poorly written, it's getting embarrassing. But, just because it was completely insane, I have to mention my ride home from NC. To make things quick and easy, the carriage top of my uncles car flew off while I was driving down the interstate, then the windshield wipers broke and then we got pulled over by the police. Quite the eventful ride home. Luckily, no one was hurt, the car got us home safely and no tickets or citations were issued by the police. Definitely thankful for that!

Today I got myself some car insurance and had a lovely conversation with a very cute boy. Things are good. Excited that I can finally start listening to Christmas music, baking Christmas goodies and putting up decorations! It's the most wonderful time of the year! Yay!

Dream big people!

Wheels

I'm all over the place right now, but first things first. I got a car today! Wooo hooo! It's just a little younger than me, but it has wheels and can get me out of my house and into the world, so mission accomplished. Why I did not take a picture of it yet, I have no idea, but I'll do that tomorrow. It's cute and I like it so no complaints here. I am so thrilled to be mobile again...feels good. I was a little hungover today from an impromptu marathon Juanita Greenburg's Saturday drink fest so maybe that is why I wasn't in picture taking mode. But, that was totally worth it. Started drinking at 2, and literally, 5 hours, 5-8 beers, 4 shots, and two plates of nachos later, I had spent $8. All thanks to my new "Gay Squad" (their words, not mine) and their Saturday generoristy. It was awesome.

In other news, the AMAs are on TV (I was not the person that turned them on, just so everyone knows) and I would just like to say Jennifer Lopez is ridiculous. I don't know if I've discussed my dislike for her before, but yeah, I'm not a huge fan. I'm just watching her perform in her like, sparkly spandex suit singing about drinking and dancing all night at the club and I'm just like, you are some one's mom, you know? I always think it's a little strange when people who have kids are performing/acting/posing or whatever else and looking all super sexy and whatnot. I mean, flaunt it if you got it I guess but how weird would it be if your mom was half-naked in front of the whole world. Happens all the time, I know, but I still think it's weird. It's obviously not just JLo, but something about her just irks me. Not that she gives a shit, she's rolling in money and I'm cruising around in a 1989 BMW sedan. So who's the winner here?

Anyway, I've also noticed from the stats that I got an influx of readers from Latvia. No idea how or why that happened but what up Latvia?!

OMG-I just saw a commercial for the new Bachelor. I mean, go Ben, but that old woman? Seriously?! Can't handle it. Sometimes I literally just can't deal with TV and it's ridiculousness. I will have to leave the room should that show ever be on in the background.

Last but not least, this girl I know started a website kind of about traveling and stuff and here's the link so check me out : http://llyov.org/647

A true reader and friend already knows this story but there it is in slightly shorter form and on a different website. Does this mean I'm a published author now? Probably.

Making more Swiss bread tonight. Seemed like a good idea a few hours ago but with another two hours of work to go, I'm not so sure anymore. We'll see.

Dream big people!

Thoughts

So. Haven't really been doing much with myself lately. I've come down off my bread making high (I'm still really proud) and then I had a really good Wednesday and now here I am doing nothing at all really. Wednesday I had a massage (thanks Mom for the gift certificate!), ran a bunch of errands and took like, the best nap ever. I don't think I got more accomplished after that but that nap was really fantastic.
Between half-ass looking for jobs/cars online, baking and an occasional outing, I have been watching a lot of daytime TV. And wow, it is SO bad. There really is no point in turning it on until like, 4 in the afternoon (when Ellen comes on) because there is NOTHING on during the day. It's awful. I try to record decent evening TV to watch during the day but I've learned my step dad gets a little stingy with the recording space. I have to delete before he finds out I took up some of his space. Man, living at home is the best. Only joking, it's really not bad but he does like to comment on everything I choose to watch. I'm not surprised, though. He likes to comment on anything and everything there is to comment on, even when no one wants to hear it. I am so appreciative of my mom and step dad but they talk A LOT during TV viewing. He also likes to watch TV at an insanely high volume which gets uncomfortable. However, we both like to watch Big Bang reruns so we get along pretty well.

Speaking of being appreciative, my mom is awesome. She bought me all these super cute winter clothes and I really wish I had more of a life so I could wear them all out. I seriously got the cutest jacket ever. I put it on in the store and literally shocked myself. For the most part, I am not a big fan of trying on clothes, or jackets for that matter because I rarely find things that are both cute and fit me well. But I have found jackets that are just that and my mom bought them all for me because she's awesome.

And speaking of cute clothes, I have been watching a What Not to Wear marathon and I have to say, I just LOVE it when the people are grateful and eager for the change.

Oh man, sorry these posts lately have been so terrible. I just don't really have anything interesting to say. Most of my thoughts lately are a little on the pathetic side and I've decided to keep them to myself. You're welcome!

Dream big people!

Oh, and this is my new obsession:

http://youtu.be/M4zCOHFrLVY

Lately

Stuff's been going on. Nothing interesting. Mainly just sleeping and eating. Still no job in case you were wondering.

11.11.11 came and went and nothing exciting happened. I didn't really have high hopes for it, but there was a tiny part of me that just maybe something crazy would happen. Nothing did. I don't even remember what I did that day. I'm that way about full moons too. I don't really think something will happen, but I'm always slightly hopeful something fun and interesting will happen and I'll be all, oh man, it's a full moon! Because that will explain the craziness. I don't know exactly what would constitute a crazy full moon time, but I'll let yall know if it ever happens.

Most of my days have been spent lounging around but today was special. I am just so excited about my day today and it is not even over yet! I know it's not really anything special but today was the first day I actually felt like getting up and doing something with myself. I didn't do anything too impressive, but I was a baking machine and things turned out much better than expected!

I decided I was going to attempt making bread. I'm not sure what exactly came over me, but someone sent me a recipe for a particular kind of Swiss bread and I thought, I can make that. I think that about lots of things and usuall things turn out on the diastrous side. I tend to skim things (like recipes) over and don't research and/or prep enough. It happened with this recipe, as per usual, so ended up with two loaves since I missed that first line that said "enough for two servings." I really don't even need one serving so I don't know what I'm going to do with the two of them, but I have to say, they turned out pretty damn tasty. I was pretty concerned about the final product after the yeast didn't really do what it was supposed to and the dough was being extremely difficult and sticky. The second batch I wrangled in with some flour and it turned out quite nice. I'm not going to lie, I am pretty impressed with myself. I did not think it would turn out well at all and oh la la, it's fantastic! Go me.

The first picture was attempt number one. Looks messy and unappealing, but it was actually pretty yummy. Flour helped get attempt two under control and made everything nicer looking. Also quite tasty. :) Bakery owner? New career path? Probably not.

I also made Nutella brownies that were a little on sad looking side, but they were also pretty delicious. Additionally, I made some cute cards to send off, cleaned the kitchen, took a shower and went the entire day without crying. A successful day if I do say so myself! Like I said, it's not even over yet! Plans to go out tonight.

Dream big people!

Home

Well. I'm here. I haven't really been up to writing. One, there hasn't been anything too exciting happening and also I have been super exhausted. I still haven't been sleeping all that well and I don't have a lot of energy or motivation to type. Still applies now, so sorry if this is lame.

Most of my days have been spent sleeping and/or eating. I have been trying to get back into the Jenny habits of dieting and exercising but it's not working out that well for me. For starters, sleeping is not exercise. I realllly wish it was, but I think I'm going to have to put in a little more effort than that. And, with my limited supply of funds, I don't think a gym membership is a good investment for me right now. Which means, running/walking is really my only option. Yes, I know I could do some sort of work out regime at home but I really just don't have the will power for that. I did get out there for a run/walk the other day. So boring. I try to go different ways so I don't get bored of the scenery, but it doesn't usually work for me.

Blah blah blah. Let's talk about positive things about being home. The previous paragraph is boring me. Since I've been home, the weather has been pretty nice. I've eaten a lot of really good food and I've gotten to see some lovely family and friends. Let's talk food. I went to a shrimp festival that had a bunch of different restaurants each with a different dish. There were some of the best shrimp dishes I have ever had, and never thought I would have. For example, shrimp and waffles. I thought I was being crazy eating chicken and waffles, and I had my doubts about this dish, but it was really really tasty. A Gullah restaurant had seafood casserole and some amazing brown rice. Sadly most of the restaurants ran out of food before I got to sample all of them, but everything I had was delicious. I've also eaten some homemade salmon and mussels (delicious) and had crab cake benedict for brunch today and put myself into a food coma. You just cannot beat the seafood here. I was trying to explain how fantastic the seafood is here to some goober foreigner I know but he doesn't think things get any better than Bubba Gump Shrimp Company in Santa Monica. He is obviously a crazy fool. I'm trying to get him to come here and see for himself. He's also under the impression he can go turkey hunting here so I'm trying to figure out how to make that happen as well.

Oh my, this is so lame. To conclude, I was having serious doubts about my decision to leave as I was leaving LA, but I think now I've done the right thing.  I'm trying to relax and get some rest so I have the energy to figure out what to do with myself next. Everyone wants to know and as soon as I know, I'll let everyone else know. I promise.Sorry this was the worst post ever.

Dream big people!

Crazy

I have one full day left in LA. This is crazy and I can't really wrap my mind around it. I am excited and I am ready for the next chapter of my life but it still is just surreal to me. Especially since I have, literally, no idea what I'm going to do with myself over the next few weeks. Or ever, really. Keep checking in, I guess.

To celebrate my amazing time in LA, I got a small little tattoo. Sorry family, I'm sure you're disappointed in me, but when you start getting angry...just think about my ridiculous brother and his tats, that are significantly larger and more obvious than mine. You can also just remember how fantastic I am and stop being mad, and start being awesome instead. So simple.

Anyway, been having a food fest here in LA lately. Went to "House of Pies" tonight and it was pretty damn delicious. I think my last meal is going to be In-N-Out. There is so much goodness to choose from, but I'm going to keep it simple.

I have almost everything packed and ready to go. Fingers crossed so hard my luggage is not overweight. You can cross yours as well, thanks.

Still not really able to process all this. I'm going to read my new book, "Little-Known Facts About Disneyland" and get some sleep.

Dream big people!

LA

Whoa. This is really happening, I am really moving out of LA. Not just for a vacation. For good. For now, anyway. In one week I will be at home. Crazy.

But, oh boy, what a long strange trip it has been. LA is seriously nuts. I mean, I don't think you can truly understand it's insanity unless you've been here. And, besides that, you don't even really understand unless you live here. AND-just to keep going...I think you don't even realize how crazy it is unless you  are not from here and/or have also spent a significant amount of time somewhere outside of LA. But then again, maybe it's just me.

It really is kind of hard to pin point just what is so strange about LA. I found a quote by David Bowie that comes close: "Being in LA is like being in the set of a movie you didn't want to see in the first place." That kind makes sense. And it's not necessarily all in a bad way either because I've had A LOT of fun here. I moved here to have an adventure and man, what an adventure it has been. I was extremely lucky for so many reasons out here and I have pretty much done and seen everything I wanted to see. The only thing I feel I truly missed out on is California Adventure. And maybe the Hollywood Bowl. But,I was lucky to find a job right away, to find such good friends, to have a job that lets me do all the fun things for free, to manage to get around ok carless, the list goes on and on. I can't even really begin to list all the good times, but I'll hit some highlights.

First off, I got to FREAKING MEET ELLEN. TWICE. I mean, how often do people actually get to meet their favorite celebrity/hero? Twice! And just meet them, but also get to make an appearance on national television (and YouTube) AND win cool shit! I don't think it happens that often. On top of that, the experience was taped and documented so generations to come will be able to the enjoy the amazingness that was "Who Dat." Surreal. Just surreal. And fantastic. Really. The book signing was not quite as exciting, but it was still pretty cool.

I also got to see my favorite singer in concert! As well as the person that sings my favorite song! Which I think is really cool because, one, he's old as the hills and two, I don't really have too many absolute favorites where I'm like, it would make me SO happy to see these people, but the two that are at the top of the list, I got to see. LUCKY. AMAZING. FANTASTIC!

Whew, I'm getting excited just thinking about all the good times. But it doesn't end there.

I went to Disneyland three times! I got to go to the happiest place on Earth three times! All for free! I mean, can't beat that! I also went to all the major amusement parks for free, which is pretty cool as well. Six Flags is a little intense for me, but Hurricane Harbor was nice and fun and Universal Studios was pretty entertaining as well.

Dodger's games were also great fun and freeee! I never knew I was such a fan of baseball, but I've got a shirt and a hat now so I'm pretty much die hard. The Lakers game was not quite as exciting, but still a good time. I hit up pretty much all of the major LA sports games, being the avid sports fan that I am. The Galaxy game was surprisingly a lot of fun and the Kings was surprisingly cold. Though it shouldn't have been because if I had any sense I would have known that being in a stadium filled with ice would be chilly and I should have taken a jacket.

And as much beef as I have with Santa Monica, it is, for the most part, gorgeous. If anything, LA is ascetically pleasing. The PCH is by far my favorite part of LA and driving onto it from the California incline is probably my top activity. Driving on the PCH in general is one of my favorite things to do and is something I'll miss for sure. The sunsets are some of the best I've seen and though the Pacific is freezing and dirty, it's pretty and combined with the ridiculously (almost scary) tall palm trees here, it makes for fantastic pictures.

I've done so much here that I can't really think of anything there is left. A few other things I didn't really get to do that I wanted was go to Mexico and Alcatraz. But I can live with that. Things in LA proper, I think I got it covered. Now all I have left to do really is eat a bunch of fantastic food I can't get back East. Shouldn't be that hard. I've got tons of friends that like to eat. There is a reason we're friends. :) And the friends are definitely the best part of my LA experience. I have met such great people from literally, all over the world and have made some great friends...best friends even. I am very very thankful.

One week. See you soon Charleston. Enjoy me while you can LA.

Dream big people.

I See the Light

ONE WEEK left at school. Insanity. I can't really wrap my head around it. I think it's going to be a good week though...Universal Studios tomorrow, Halloween party on Thursday and Six Flags on Friday. I am actually not that excited about Six Flags because 1. I have to be there until like, 11 on a Friday night and 2. It turns into scary Six Flags at night and I don't really like scary things. I seriously might not go in. Unless I have some cute boy to hang onto, I don't like being scared on purpose. My cute boy is much too far away to hang onto and I think it's all girls going. Boo.

Anyway, such a good weekend! Just hung out with friends Friday and Saturday nights and had some super fun adventures in Hollywood and the Fashion District of LA. First, I found the remaining components for my Minnie Mouse costume and I am super pumped to wear it Thursday. Second, the fashion district is literally the most insane shit ever. It is jam packed with people selling any and everything you could possibly need or want. A lot of things you didn't even realize you needed until you were walking along and it got shoved in your face or pointed out by an extremely pushy non-English speaking salesperson. It's fantastic. There are also lots of things I can't possibly imagining anyone buying on the streets. Like mini rabbits. And turtles. So strange. It is a bit of a sensory overload though, especially if you're tired. You need to have a lot of stamina for Fashion District. And cash. They are not credit card friendly. You also have to be careful because there is a good chance you'll get run over by a stroller/churro cart/portable clothing stand if you are not paying attention.

Anyway, after FD, I had my goodbye Korean BBQ dinner and it was everything I dreamed it would be. A celebratory meat festival. You basically order a shit ton of meat and cook it yourself, dip it in delicious sauces and good times are had by all. We had tongue, pork shoulder butts, chicken, beef, beef and then some more beef. We stayed away from the stomach, even though I was all for trying it. To do it good friends makes it that much better. Good friends plus two random girls that randomly showed up as well. Plus, I got presents! And we had Yogurtland afterwards! Such a great night. And to make things EVEN better, I didn't make myself sick full, for once, even though I probably ate my weight in meat. Lately (like right now) I have been eating way to much than I can handle and I end up feeling so terrible. It was a KBBQ miracle that I was able to enjoy my meat without wanting to throw up and die afterwards like normally. Tonight I ate probably half of what I ate last night and that is how I feel. Very strange. Body, I would appreciate some consistency.

So. I'm going to miss my friends here a lot. Still can't believe I only have a week. I know I did it to myself and I know it's for the best, but it's going to be a tough goodbye. Let's worry about that later. Universal Studios tomorrow! Even though I'm not actually going inside, I'm looking forward to not being in the office.

Dream big people!

Sorry

I know I am going straight to hell and will piss off some people, but attention everyone: I do NOT want to see your ultrasound pictures on fb. Don't want to. Sorry, just don't. Ultrasound pictures are ugly and creepy and only a very specific demographic of people care about seeing your unborn child. That does not include me, random person you went to high school with and haven't actually spoken to in 5+ years. Email that mess to your loved ones, the people that think your fetus is precious. I, your random facebook friend, doesn't even really want to see your child after it's born and I definitely don't want to see it when it's still in alien form.

Whew. That felt good. Go ahead, feel free to judge me and my cold heartedness but seriously, I don't want to have to start de-friending people just because you or your significant other gets pregnant. That in itself kind of weirds me out but to involve me in all the creepy details that comes before it's actually a person. No thank you. I can deal with baby pictures. Babies can be cute and sometimes they do cute or funny things that are worthy of taking pictures of and putting them on fb. My wall is currently overrun with babies and I can deal with that. Unborn babies I cannot take.

That is all. I'm a horrible person. But I'm feeling bitter right now and I really do not care. I also know I'm not the only person that feels this way.

Dream big people.

Damn

I don't want to mess this thing up

Two Down

It's official! I sent in my two weeks resignation today and I am officially quitting in two weeks! So exciting! Oh boy oh boy oh boy. It really is just such a relief to have that over and done with! There are still very minor things to be worried about with it, but I think I am just going to ignore them because they might not actually happen. I was seriously giddy today when I sent it off...I couldn't stop smiling. It's too bad I was actually at work when I did it and couldn't really celebrate properly (with a drink, of course) but that will be soon enough.

I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders and I can actually start to enjoy my last two weeks and not worry about every stupid thing. Now all that's left really is figuring out how I'm going to get everything home. But there is time for that. Don't worry, be happy. That is my new mantra. That, and, every little thing is gonna be ok. Because it will. Eventually.

Dream big people!

One Down

Finally I can cross something off my list of things to worry about. Kinda. But, for now, I am completely finished with my stupid apartment. It has been a big dramatic pain in my ass, but I left my key there today and I do not plan on going back anytime soon. I'm almost positive I'm going to keep getting phone calls from my landlord, but I haven't decided yet if I'm going to continue to answer them. Not sure of the point anymore but I also feel that is a little rude. But seriously, I literally just have no idea what to do anymore. I did everything I could and I can't make my former roommates help or do what they are supposed to do, so I really just don't want to have anything to do with it anymore. I feel the same about my job. It's annoying and I am actually just kind of insulted about how my exit is being handled, but what can you do? I don't have control over assholes and their asshole behavior so I should probably just move on with my life. Now all I have to worry about is work and how I'm going to get all my shit packed and back home. Sigh.

For a teensy bit more negative news, some people suck so bad it literally blows my mind. I mean, I guess I'm not surprised anymore at how rude people can be, but it really just still stuns me that people can be so awful to other people. I got stood up 5 times this week. FIVE. Unreal. I'm not saying all French people suck...but wow. This kid sucks more than most people I know. He reminds me, actually, a lot of certain someone I used to associate myself with. Thankfully, I'm starting to, slowly but surely, learn from some of my past mistakes. So instead of getting the runaround for a couple years, it only took a few days for me to cut this bastard out of my life. Not even in the romantic sense, but as friend.

Anyway, on to the positive. Some people are so awesome. And I am so thankful I have them to cancel out the asshats that try to ruin everything. Just as the rudeness of people stuns me, the kindness does as well sometimes. I dont' know what I did to deserve people being so nice to me, but I really appreciate it and I hope they know that. That is really my only concern, that people know how much I appreciate them and their kindness.

I also appreciate good food. Which I stuffed myself with this weekend. I went a little insane, actually. I was kind of surprised/embarrassed for myself. I'm not really sure what was my deal, but I acted like I hadn't eaten a good meal in months. Maybe it was just the sheer joy of being out in the social world, surrounded by people and fun, rather than being at my lonely depressing apartment. But I really do need to remember to slow down and not eat more than I can handle because I made myself sick from being full every day this weekend. So I guess that stuff earlier about learning my lessons doesn't really apply here. We went to a BBQ place for my friends birthday Saturday night and the second the food got set down, I like, lost my mind. I literally started shoveling food in. I have no idea where the mentality of eat as much and as fast as you can comes from because I've never been in a setting where me going hungry is a possibility but that is how I reacted. Which was especially stupid because there was more than enough food to go around. But it was sooo delicious. I probably should have savored it but I thought inhaling it was a better idea. My Jenny Craig lady is not going to be happy with me.

I also put myself into a food coma today via mediocre Chinese food. This time it was because it was my first meal of the day at 5:00 but still, eating slowly wouldn't have hurt anybody. So now here I am with a tummy ache. And, at that Chinese restaurant I got the worst fortune cookie of all time! "As long as you don't sign up for anything new, you'll be fine." Like, what the hell?! Don't sign up for anything new? Never take a new class, make a change for a new job, house, car, etc? I am so confused. Made me a little uncomfortable since I'm about to make a whole bunch of new changes. But then I remembered fortune cookies are not real and stupid, so I'm good. My Japanese friend got "As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters not point in your direction." Also stupid and also spent a good 20 minutes trying to explain it to him. Staying away from fortune cookies for a while, thank you very much.

Having internet is awesome. Time to catch up on a shit ton of TV I've been missing out on.

Dream big people!

Insane with anger

I'm trying REALLY hard not to be a huge ball of anger, walking around, lashing out at anyone and anything but my patience is being tested. So, I'll just let it all out here, for all my fantastic readers to suffer through. If you are not interested in my venting, please, go over to the archives and select a happier themed post. Don't say I didn't warn you.

But for real. Everything fucking SUCKS right now. I am getting screwed over left and right by people and it is sooooo irritating. My landlord is being an ass, my old roommates are not helping things, my apartment is just a shitshow of nonsense in general and people in general are not making me happy. Oh, and of course there's work and all the stupid mess that is, as well as just people in general who are pissing me off. People that don't do what they say they're going to do are the lowest of the low, in my opinion and I actually went for a RUN the other day because I was so enraged, I just didn't know what to do with myself. That's right people, a run. I do not run, I loathe running but I literally didn't know what else to do with myself. It helped a little, but I don't think it's going to be habit forming. Running sucks.

Anyway, right now, my apartment is a sad, sad place to be. I have no internet, no TV, no roommates and hardly any furniture. There is nothing on the walls, only peeling paint and holes that serve as a reminder that I will be paying for those repairs with my deposit. All that's left really is shit that I have no idea how I'm going get rid of.

Whatever. Because Friday, all this crap will be over and done with and I won't have to think about it anymore. COME THE FUCK ON FRIDAY!

Also, not sure how many people know, or care, but I'm moving back to the East Coast in November. More on my thoughts on that change later (they're vast and confusing...currently trying to sort through them all) but yeah. I'm going home. Temporarily, I hope.

Anyway. I know, I know, I KNOW things could be a lot worse so I'm hoping to leave all my frustrations here on this page and be done. Check back later and see how that went.

Dream big people!

Trippin

So, chilling at Long Beach and I am surrounded by crazies. For some reason I was under the impression that Long Beach had less crazy people than Santa Monica but I am wrong. And I am not sure why I had that impression in the first place. There are lots of them here and it's equally as annoying. Oh well, I'm not sure that I will ever escape the crazies.

Anyway, it's really nice out today! I'm happy because yesterday it was pouring down rain. Actually, it didn't really matter because I stayed in bed for most of the day. I was "sick" and just couldn't get out of bed. It was tragic, really. Then I ate Chick-Fil-A and I was magically cured! It was truly a miracle people.

I don't really have anything else exciting going on. And that was last week, here we are now on Monday morning and I still don't have anything exciting going on.

For the weekend, I finally watched "Tangled" and it was fantastic. I highly recommend it to anyone that likes Disney movies and feels like being taken on a roller coaster of emotions via cartoon animation. I also watched "Megamind," and it was good. I had to give back the school car on Saturday, which was really quite depressing. For one last hurrah, I drove up the PCH and hung out on the Malibu beaches, enjoying the lovely Cali weather. Sunday I cleaned my entire apartment and separated all the shit I have into piles, as well as threw away a substantial amount of shit. I am pretty angry about the whole apartment nonsense. Not only am I cleaning a whole bunch of shit that is not mine, but I will also be paying for repairs that were not my fault and I have to figure out what to do with a bunch of heavy shit that I can't move on my own. I am not a happy camper right now. Trying not to dwell but I CANNOT freaking wait for this week to be OVER.

Big something happening tomorrow. Ready for that day to be over as well. Everything sucks a lot right now and I kind of don't know what to do with myself. This too shall pass. The sooner the better.

Dream big people.

Champagne Problems

Oh my goodness. Once again, no internet is the least cool thing ever. So much stuff to look up and comment on, not enough time/internet to do it. Right now, I'm at the Panera Bread in the Camarillo Outlet Mall. I'm pretty sure the people that work here are a little leery of me, as I have been here for a good 3 hours now. The girls I brought here for shopping wanted to get in a good 5 hours of shopping, so here I sit. No complaints, just saying.

Anyway, I've decided I really like this phrase "Champagne Problems" because it is pretty much how I feel when I complain about my life. Because I know my life is pretty awesome and comparatively, I have it really good. For instance, waa, my new Blackberry is giving me so problems. My nice new expensive phone I could afford to buy isn't working how I want it to. Right? Champagne Problems. See how this works? So I go through this vicious cycle where I get whiny and complain, but then I get angry with myself because I feel like I shouldn't be whiny, I should be grateful that I don't have real problems like not enough food to eat, clothes to wear, etc. But then, if I don't talk about it or acknowledge that I have problems, things build up and I have a minor meltdown. Like I said, a vicious circle.

But enough about that. Let's talk about how I went to Disneyland on Tuesday and it was fantastic. Anyone that knows me or is a true fan of this blog knows how much I love Disney. There's really no need to go into all the details but to sum it up: Disneyland makes me really happy and I love going there. The parade is quite possibly the best thing in life. And in conclusion, if you don't like Disneyland, I don't want to hear and I also think you are a stupid person (co-worker). So that's that.

We also went to Six Flags and it was fun, although obviously not as fantastic as Disney. I think I'm getting old too because some of the rollercoasters beat me up! I got banged around on one and was like, ok, I can't ride anymore. It was really hot as well, so I think I was just overall exhausted but I got in bed last night at 9:00. I didn't go to sleep then, but I was out not too long after that.

I think not writing as often is making me rusty because I don't really have the patience or motivation to continue on with this post. So much to say, not enough brain power to get it all out. Next time. Going to a college football game tomorrow (University of Southern California...the fake USC)...another place to make me feel old. But I think it will be fun.

Dream big people!

Dislike

Not having internet at home SUCKS. A lot. As someone that has a lot to say and no one around to listen to everything I have to say, this is my place to get it all out. And with no internet at home to let it all out, I'm keeping it all in and this is no good.

Annnnd, oh my goodness. I was just looking through some of the evaluations from the students and for some bad/hilarious news:
What did you dislike about CSL: "JACKY"

Literally, that is what was written.

For some good news:
Activities comments: "Activities with Jacky were absolute gorgeous. :)"

So, hooray for nice, gorgeous people.

Anyway, I have to go. Life is so strange these days. And for even more good news: DISNEYLAND tomorrow! 6 Flags on Thursday! Football on Saturday! Looking forward to this week.

Dream big people!

SoCal Hospitality

Or lack thereof, rather.

Now, I have met very nice people in LA. I've also met very rude people in SC. However, over the last few days it seems to me that LA wins on rude, ridiculous people that choose to be assholes to you and or just display a total lack of character in public. I don't think this is really all LA's fault since it is pretty much the tourist capital of the world and it can't really be held responsible for every asshole that comes through but I've been encountering some really sucky people lately. I don't have stats, I'm just guessing about the tourists but it's pretty common for me to surrounded by a million people, none of which that are speaking English. Because of work, I find myself at the top tourist destinations so this is probably why, but I think it's a little strange sometimes. Currently, I'm at the Citadel Outlet malls, trying to talk myself out of going on a shopping spree. It's proving to be difficult.

ANYWAY. Lots has been happening the past couple of days. Biggest and most dramatic, a car accident on the 405. Anyone that has driven in LA knows the 405 is the worst roadway that ever existed as it was paved by the devil himself. No worries though, it was very minor, no one was hurt, it wasn't my fault and most importantly, everyone in my car (me and six passengers) was ok. The other driver is claiming I rear-ended him which seems strange to me because one, that is totally false and two, the dent on my car (from where he hit me) is on the side and there's no damage to the front of my car. So seems like a stretch for him to be claiming I hit from behind. But, whatever, we just have to wait and see what the police and insurance reports say. Should be a lot of fun.

Then, I went to Universal Studios and someone thought while waiting in line to get tickets was an appropriate place to to clip their nails. Like, WHAT? What the WHAT? So ridiculous. I am pretty opposed to preforming most personal grooming habits in public, including, but not limited to, brushing your hair, picking your teeth, putting on deodorant and above all else, clipping your fucking nails! JEEZ. Mainly because of the horrible noise the clippers make.

Side note: also while at Universal, I saw the movie "I Don't Know How She Does It," and I Don't Know How or Why That Movie Got Made. It was so soo SO bad. It was boring and terrible and sent a terrible message and I am glad I only had to spend $2 to see it.

Last night I dropped something into a mailbox on the sidewalk and was walking back to my car and this creepster behind me was all, "I don't even know you." I looked back at him because I was like, um, is he talking to me? I don't know you either, nor did I say or do anything to you. Then he goes, "why don't you eat shit and die?" Again, WHAT? What the fuck is your deal dude? It took me by surprise and kind of made me laugh, but I thought it was best to keep walking (a little more quickly) and not respond with a "fuck you" like I wanted.

Annnd, last but certainly most fun, our landlord is being a total dick. Yay!!! So super fun the process of leaving my apartment has been. Turns out, we probably won't get any of our security deposit back since the walls are painted, there are holes in the wall and broken screens. Most fun of all, NONE of it is my fault, my decision or my doing. Hooray for other people being assholes and costing me a whole bunch of money. Yay yay yay.

People, I am so tired. I don't know what the problem is. I haven't gotten a good nights sleep in like, two weeks. I'm not unhappy, I'm just tired ALL the time. All I want to do is lay around and watch TV which I can't do because I don't have a TV. Booo, feel sorry for me.

No, just kidding, don't. I'm fine. I just need some sleep I guess. Still trying to figure out my future plans, but just thinking about them makes me tired. It's a vicious cycle.

Dream big people!

Three Little Birds

Every time I freak out about something, I tend to forget that in (usually) just a few short days, everything will be ok. Yeah. I should try to remember that. I mean, I kind of do, but it's hard to focus on that and stop crying. Also, having sad things happen around the your "monthly" (sorry boys) time is really just unfortunate. I'm a cryer, in general, but around that time, it's amplified and uncontrollable sobbing starts when really just a few tears would suffice. I mean, crying in your room is one thing, but at work, while driving, at the gym, buying groceries, etc, etc i s a little much. Really, your room is the best place for crying. There, you can also make the pathetic wailing noises that make everything more dramatic but somehow also makes things a little better. I think it's just one more step in the release process. I don't know, maybe that's just me.

Anyway, this week, things are MUCH better. It's funny because, really, things have kind of started to come apart even more so than before, but I'm ok with it. I've got a new plan, I've started putting the gears into motion and I'm actually quite excited about the whole thing. It's a whole long story and I don't want to explain it all/say anything until I know a few things for sure, but I'm taking steps in the right direction and it feels good. Also, while some things are falling apart, other things are falling perfectly into place. Life is so weird.

Also, I've had some really good activities lately with really nice students and it has lifted my spirits. Having people write "Jacky is not friendly," is a little bit soul crushing at times, but can be canceled out when someone tells you otherwise. There is one student, though, that I kind of want to punch in the face. This one girl I tried SO hard with because she went on a lot of activities, but she would NEVER talk. She answered all my questions with one word and never seemed happy. Normally I'm like, whatever, when they complain, but this girl in particular really irked me because she went with me on the trip to Disneyland on my birthday. And I'm sorry, but I have never been friendlier or nicer than I was on that day. I was bursting with happiness, friendliness, and overall joy on that day. So, I just don't really understand why or how she could possibly say I was not friendly after the almost excessive amount of enthusiasm I had on that day. She's gone now, but seriously? Fuck you. Also, you have ugly stupid bangs and you, Miss one word answers, are not friendly. So there.

Moving right along, I just finished this hilarious book and I highly recommend it. I laughed out loud at multiple parts and was sad when I got to the last page. It's "A Year of Living Biblically" by AJ Jacobs and it was one of the best books I've read in a long time. The title pretty much explains it, but it's basically this guy trying to live by the Bible's rules for a year. It's so funny and some parts are touching and insightful and I really really enjoyed it. He has another about reading the entire encyclopedia, and I'm going to read that next I think. (Also, thanks Dad and Kellie for the Barnes and Noble giftcard with which I bought it!)

So that's my life now. I'm excited about the next phase, trying to enjoy the end of this one and so thankful that I have really fantastic friends here in LA. Everywhere, really, but some really great ones here. I will definitely be sad to say goodbye to them. I'll dwell on that later though.

Dream big people!

Motivation

Motivation is kind of difficult to come by these days. I tend to get motivated late at night, when I can't actually do any of the things I'm motivated to do. For an assortment of reasons. It usually involves looking up things on the internet, which is no longer possible at my house. Or, it involves doing things at places that are already closed for the day. This is often the gym, the bank, work, or a library. Also, a lot of the time, I'm like, oh, I can't study for the GRE now, I have to go to bed. Then, I go to bed, and when I wake up in the morning, all my motivation is gone.

Anyone that knows me pretty much knows I am not a morning person in any way, shape or form. There are few things I hate more in this life than waking up early. I know it's stupid and I should be grateful for each day, blah blah blah. But if I have to wake up to an alarm, watch out. Seriously. Just don't talk to me. I eventually get my shit together and can act like a normal human being, but for the most part, I hate life for the first hour or so of my day.

Point is, I get really grumpy in the morning and have no motivation to do anything. Then, I do the things I have to do and then it's not until much later in the evening that I feel inclined to do anything productive. Sometimes I clean my room, do laundry or cook dinner and I feel quite accomplished for the day. Then, I start thinking about the million other things I should be doing, get motivated enough to write them all down somewhere and then I get overwhelmed/tired and go to bed. It's a vicious cycle and sometimes I truly wonder how I managed to do a million plus things in high school and college. Tis a mystery.

But, for now, I'm counting not crying today (at ALL) as a huge victory on my part. I figure another couple cry-less days and I will be well on my way accomplishing all sorts of major goals.

I still don't know if my big possibility is happening, but I'm still hopeful and if things haven't really been made final by the end of the week, I think I am going to move into phase two. So we'll see how that goes.

In other news, I feel good about orientation today. I was extra friendly and one of the students told me he reminded me of a "very beautiful Australian actress." So, that is always nice to hear. I also came to work at 11:15 and no one said anything, so I think I'm just going to keep coming later and later until someone tells me not too.

Dream big people!

PS-Also, someone please come visit me. I need some East Coast love for real.

Loserville

I am the biggest loser of all time. I don't really care anymore, but I'm pretty positive it's true. Instead of being out in Vegas, getting drunk and doing crazy Vegas things, I am sitting in my hotel, watching Jimmy Kimmel live (a filler until Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, duh), alone and really looking forward to bed.

So that's my life now.

But seriously. Whatever. I'm tired and I'm getting old and I don't have anyone here to go out with, so here I am. Also, my hotel is really nice and once again, I'm taking full advantage of the internet and TV, which I still do not have at home. And I spent the day at the pool and I really just can't complain about that, ever.

Thanks to everyone that has been concerned about my well-being as of late. Things have improved a great deal. Which means I got through today without crying my eyes out for embarrassingly extended amounts of time. I'm counting this as a plus on my part. I am still sad as shit but I remembered that life goes on, time heals all wounds and all that other bullshit. Basically, life sucks and is super unfair but I also got to spend my workday at the pool so I should probably shut the fuck up and stop whining.

In other news, I think I am developing a new life plan and I'm pretty excited about it. I need a change. I've found change is almost always a positive thing for me, even if it is a big pain in the ass to get going and can be super scary. For example, I just changed to a new phone and it was a huge pain in the ass, as well as expensive. Not really scary, but the point is it has been awesome. I'm in love with my new Blackberry and apologize in advance for the excessive amount of facebook posts that will be coming your way.

Anyway, it's pretty undeveloped right now and the beginning stage is hinging on a very uncertain possibility, but I think it could be good. Don't want to talk too much about it and jinx it, but I'm hoping to get some things nailed down in the next few weeks and move forward with my life.

Last but not least, I just realized my hair is getting really long. I haven't decided just how I feel about it yet. I think I like it but I'm all, should I cut it short again? I think I'm going to focus on finishing my weight loss goals for now and then worry about hair. Oh, and getting my life straightened out. That is important as well.

Ok. Time for the real Jimmy. Gotta focus.

Dream big people!