Hasta Luego

Why I remember this randomness, I don't know. Why I'm sharing this with you, I really don't know. But when I was young, my mom had a video of some guy performing children's songs. It was for really young kids (3-8 probably), but I watched it all the time when I was older (11ish) since I had younger siblings. Also, I won't lie, I liked it. I watched Nickelodeon until I was like, 16 so whatever.

Anyway, this video had a song at the end that went something like this,

"When you don't want to say goodbye, you can say hasta luego. So long, see see you later. I want to see you very soon again, my friend. Si si, maybe tomorrow. You are my special amigo. That's cause you mean so much to me."

I'm very upset I can't find video for this gem, but it's a catchy little jam. I wish I could sing it out loud for you, so it would get stuck in your head too. Holy crap, I am such a loser right now, but I really don't care.

I don't EVER want to say goodbye. I really really hate saying goodbye to people. Not like, bye! See you tomorrow. More like, bye, I really have no idea if I'll ever see you again. And it really sucks because I have to say goodbye like that to people every week. Students leave school every week and it just makes me really upset. There are levels to the upset, but it makes me feel strange every Thursday and Friday. Every time I do, this silly song pops in my head and I really wish I had the video to sing me through the pain.

Sometimes, they are students that I wasn't close with or didn't particularly care for, but saying goodbye to them still makes me feel weird. It's worse when they are ones that I enjoyed seeing everyday, because I really am sad to see them go. But the worst is when I was friends with them (Hi Mario! Hi Birthe!), and I get VERY sad. Especially when they declare me "Jackie-best secratary in all the world." I hate being called the secretary, but if I have to be one, I guess it's ok that I'm the best in the world. It sucks too, because they leave in the middle of the day, so I have to keep working and don't really have the time or the privacy to be sad about it.

I've always hated goodbyes. I would cry and cry at the end of camp, the last day of the semester, coming home from trips, even at season finales of shows sometimes. Even if I didn't watch the show! If it was the last one, I would get upset. Obviously, it's worse when it's real life because it's happening to me and I can't do anything about it. I hate it! Ugh, I feel so strange right now. I go through this every week and have no idea how to not get upset about it. I don't like having to say goodbye to friends all the time. :(

I guess I'll just have to say hasta luego because hopefully we will meet again! For now, perhaps an after work dance party will make things a little better.

Dream big people! See see you later!