I wanted more of a sassy walk off

So yesterday I had written a positive spin on my post, talking about how much I had learned from TV...but apparently that part got erased. So I just wanted to post today (for all two of my readers) and say that things are better. I watched a lot of housewife TV yesterday and it made me realize some things.

1. I am really looking forward to being old and awesome like the Golden Girls. I am hoping to be more platinum when I'm old (get it, rich!) but just as cool. Those ladies are fabulous and wear the best clothes and I can't wait to be just like them! And I get to live in Miami, which will be great because it stays nice and warm there.

2. TLC's What Not To Wear is another fabulous show. Makes me realize I could be waaay worse off. I know I'm not especially fashionable, but I am definitely not struggling like some of those people. And one woman I saw was just downright hateful, rude and extremely unappreciative. Who wouldn't appreciate FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS worth of free clothes!?! Apparently not this heinous bitch. In short, I'm glad I'm not horrible like her. It also makes me miss Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. That show was fantastic.

3. There is another show but refuse to watch about little girls in beauty pageants, but I see the commercials all the time. That's where the sassy walk off line is from...one of the moms is mad at her little girl because there is too much skipping in her walk. It's really ridiculous. Then the host person is talking about how little girl pageants is his PASSION. Which is kind of creepy. How do you get passionate about something like that? Those girls are so sad and weird looking. But, whatever, to each his own I guess.

And on a side note, my brother is a lot cooler than I give him credit for. Sometimes. Like yesterday.

Now I need to finish packing. As soon as I finish watching The O.C. It's sooo dramatic, I love it! I'm really close to being finished (with packing) and am hoping to de-stress enough to be excited. I wonder how many "last nights" I'm going to have....

Dream big people.

jacky and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day

Is it even legal for me to take the title of that book and just change one word? I hope so. Just to cover my back, "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day" is by Judith Viorst, is fantastic and in no way my own orginal combination of words.

It is just how my day went. It just really sucked a lot. A highlight was lunch with a friend at one of my favorite sushi restuarants, but I had trouble enjoying it because I was so upset. Money issues have been dragging me down lately and I hate that, but I guess that's what happens when you go unemployed for months at a time. I did have other highlights I guess. My brother turned out to be a lot cooler than I had been thinking lately and I watched like, four episodes of Golden Girls and it really did make my life better. GG therapy...you should try it. Then I watched some What Not to Wear and that made me happy too. Man, I did a lot of TV watching today. Shame. I guess sometimes you need it. I'm just stressing about the big move and questioning if it really is a good idea. Part of me thinks it's totally ridiculous and stupid, but another part of me knows that I really need to leave Charleston and should at least give LA a try. I'm just going to get back to packing and look forward to tomorrow not sucking so bad.

Dream big people.

Merry Christmas To All...

....And To All, A Good Night :)

Making a list, checking it twice

I don't really feel like writing, so I'm just going to make a list of my random thoughts lately. Do with them what you will.

1. Sixteen candles is a super fabulous movie. "No, he's not retarded..." CLASSIC.

2. I am getting really excited about being famous in LA. Also really pumped to peace out of Charleston for a while.

3. I haaaattteeeee cold weather. Hate it.

4. I am really bitter right now. I wish I weren't, cause I feel I should be festive and jolly, but I'm not. I'm feeling more Grinch like.

5. My brother is super lame. Even if he did give me a the great new tag line I've been looking for.

6. Jon Stewart is fantastic. As is Stephen Colbert.

7. I am interested in knowing when I am going to finally learn my lesson when it comes to boys. Apparently not today.

8. People can get crazy when it comes to ham. This woman today was seriously stressing out. It took her 45 minutes to pick out a ham, no joke. It was ridiculous, I had to walk away. Also, I need to work on not shutting down when people piss me off. Two women came in today and one said "She doesn't find that amusing" in reference to me. I'll let you fill in the blanks, but obviously I was a little less than friendly. And I'm sorry, but when you demand that I open five hams without a please in there, I don't take kindly to it.

9. Conservative people are also crazy. But it's funny.

10. The Big Bang Theory is hilarious. I wish my computer didn't suck, I would watch episodes on line.

11. The "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter" commercial with the Latin flavor is beyond amazing. Kudos to their marketing director.



12. I need to make a new life to-do list. It's flying by and I am not really prepared.

13. Oh my gosh, Tiger Woods, GO AWAY.

14. I CANNOT understand why Ray has the Christmas lights going off at 2:00 AM. Who is out admiring our lights at 2 in the morning? WHHHHOOOO????? Besides me, last night, when I was out driving Cody's dumb ass around.

15. I miss my right Converse shoe. Every time I see the left one I get a little sad I can't wear them...and a little depressed I can't afford to buy myself another pair.

That's it for now. Time for bed, I'm back on grandma schedule. I kind of like it. Night fools.

Dream big people.

Just a suggestion

Well dammit.

Things were going well, I was having a pretty fantastic week and then I got home today and everything went all to hell. But, I think things will be better tomorrow. Anyways, when I got home today I had some mail waiting on me and one was a super lovely bill for $200 for a doctor's appointment a few weeks ago. It was for blood work I had done that was a total waste of time and I'm just really pissed about the whole thing. The entire doctor experience just made me angry. Then I went upstairs and Under the Tuscan Sun was on and it made me sad. So here I am, pissed and sad and I should just go to bed. I'm headed that way soon, don't worry.

However, prior to this silly evening, things were going really well. I had some interesting experiences this past week that put a smile on my face. And last night we got second at trivia, which would make me a second place winner for two weeks in a row now. That basically makes me a genius. Only not really because I was not the only person playing and didn't really have that much to offer in the way of answers. But who's keeping track?

I also started working at the ham store this week and it's actually really entertaining and kind of fun. Plus I get free sandwiches and they are soooo good. The Santa gig is getting kind of old. It's super easy, but my manager annoys the shit out of me and being in the cold for hours at a time is not all that fun. The kids are fun, but that's where the fun ends. Only a few more days though, I think I can deal. Plus it's the holidays and it's almost Christmas so it's ok.

Well, I have more interesting things to say but the movie just keeps making me sadder, so I'm going to stop. Things will be better tomorrow.

Night night.

The party don't start till I walk in....

Don't ask me why, but I am so in love with that "Tik Tok" song. You know, "wake up in the morning feelin like P Diddy...." etc. I get really happy every time I hear it. I imagine that is what life is going to be like in LA. I'll brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack, smack boys that are too drunk, and so on. It's going to be great.

But for now, life is not as interesting. The jobs are going ok, nothing exciting. I am, surprise, not a fantastic salesperson, but I am getting good at taking pictures and running the register. And at the Santa job the other day a little girl asked me if Santa was my dad. It was pretty funny.

On Monday I went on a little road trip to PC to ask for recommendations and get transcripts, which turned out to be a lovely little visit. I got to see old professors and friends I haven't seen in a while and it was really nice. It was only slightly cumbersome to keep explaining my life over the last couple of months over and over again. Everyone had different questions and comments though, so it was fine I guess. I also stopped by my high school on the way home and the secretary asked if I was a senior. Haha, just when I was thinking I maybe looked age appropriate. NOPE! Good times.

Currently, I am in the process of applying to grad school...in Amsterdam. So it's pretty challenging/frustrating/confusing/expensive. I am trying to focus on the end product though and how it would be so freaking AWESOME to go to school in Amsterdam, so I keep on pushing through. I only have a few things left, so I'm hoping to get it done soon. Cross your fingers for me!

Oh, and I got a new phone yesterday. I really just wanted a newer model of the one I already had but apparently they don't make those anymore. The phone store guy was straight up making fun of me and how old my phone was. Whatever phone store guy! I totally love my old phone! In fact, I might just take the SIM card out of the new one and go back to it. It's small, fits in my pocket and does everything I want it too. The new one is bigger, doesn't do everything I want and does way more than I would ever want or need. I'm going to give it a fair chance and test run it for a few days, but it's not looking good. It doesn't do basic stuff, like allow me to block numbers, use my own music for a ring tone, and convert money for me. Old phone did all that and we got along just fine, thank you. I don't know why I'm so resistant to the newer phone models. I think it's kind of because whenever I see people that are constantly on their phones and think they are all super awesome, I think they are pretty lame and I don't want to be like that. Old phone keeps me grounded. And we went through a lot together, it's like an old friend.

So that's that. Back to writing a motivation statement.

Working Machine

I am back to my old ways of multiple jobs. Which isn't a bad thing, because I like being busy. However, it does mean more encounters with the public, which is not my favorite thing in the world. But, we are going to think positive because it does mean I get three paychecks and though they are small, it's still real money. Three months of no job has taken it's toll on my bank account and I would like to see more happening on the deposit side of my account. It is currently dominated by the withdrawal side and it's really just kind of depressing. I also can't control my spending. I try to just avoid going in stores but sometimes it can't be helped. Today I went to Michaels and had a freaking field day. There are so many cute things in there and I bought all this ridiculously cute stuff to make Christmas cards with. Then I kept seeing things I could make/buy for gifts and I just couldn't not buy them. So really, I'm being totally selfless because I'm buying gifts. Ok, that's kind of a stretch because I bought myself something too, but I like to put a positive spin on things.

And although I'm pretty sure it's wishful thinking, I would like to think that after this year, my time at really stupid jobs are over. I do not like being trained by ridiculous people that think I am an idiot just because I am taking a part time job. I can read and I also know how to count change. Tonight my new boss literally read my contract aloud to me and then asked at least four times if I knew how to make change in my head JUST in case I hit the button on the cash register too soon and the amount I am supposed to give as change goes away. And then he asked if my mind was blown after he explained how to make a transaction AND issue a refund in the span of 10 minutes. I mean, it was A LOT to process, but somehow my mind stayed intact. UGH. People. I need to dust off that resume and get it looking nice and impressive for LA.

In other news, today I shot a handgun, a shotgun and a rifle. At targets, not people. Pretty sure I wasn't anywhere close to hitting the targets, but it was still pretty exciting. I also tried to have a nice discussion about food with my dad and brother and they just were not having it. Apparently they are not as into discussing where they like to eat as much as I am. I need Katrina for that. Also, we didn't really agree on what's good and what's not. They have bad taste, I don't. It was difficult.

I'm back to my old woman ways of going to bed early and not being interested in leaving the house. I think it's the cold weather. I HATE COLD WEATHER. I am seriously going to look into moving somewhere near the equator permanently. Who's with me? And don't tease me because I really want to do it.

In the meantime, I am roadtripping to PC next week and I'm really pumped. You should be too.

Adios amigos.

Hi December!

I only wrote four posts in November and that makes me a little sad. So I'm getting December off to a good start and am going to try and do better this month. Not making any promises.

I'm currently watching the Biggest Loser and have some thoughts. First off, I'm kind of ashamed that I got sucked into this nonsense. Reality TV makes me so sad, but my family was all about it in Florida and I got all involved. And it's not that I really even like this show, there is way to much crying and too many dramatic pauses. Also, Jillian whatsherface sucks. More on her later. But I do like to see how much these people change. It's crazy how much better they look! I mean, I know that sounds awful, but they do! They just ran a marathon and that is crazy awesome. I am doing good to run a mile, so running 26.2 is completely unreal to me. Especially these people that were hugely overweight just a few short weeks ago. Go them. It makes me feel pretty lazy. I wish it inspired me to go run, but it actually does the opposite. It makes me grateful I am not hugely fat and then I go eat some ice cream. So that's not good. I mean, I see how great they look after losing weight, so seeing that I'm already crazy hot, if I lost some weight, imagine how fabulous I would look. It could potentially blow your mind. Also, I don't think it's fair that they put the men and women against each other...it's a lot easier for men to lose weight (or so I've heard) and it's ridiculous to pit them against each other. Lastly, Jillian is just a little much for me and I don't like her. Especially after reading an interview with her (it was at the doctor's office, there were no other options) and she said walking is for losers...or something along those lines. I am so happy for you, Jillian, that you get to stay fit for a living and have the money to exercise all the time and eat organic food, but not everyone has that luxury. So shut your ugly skinny face. I like Bob and his cool shoes, interesting voice and sweet tats.

Moving on. I think I got another job today. We'll see. As far as the elf gig, it's going ok so far. I'm happy it's only a seasonal job, but it's really not bad. It gets chilly for sure, but everyone I work with is nice and it's fun to watch how different kids react to Santa. Most of them are really cute, but we have a few that freak out and it's pretty funny. We have lots of rich yuppy Mt. Pleasant parents, but most people are nice. And last week we had pet night and that was really fun. We had probably 20 dogs come get their picture with Santa and most of them were sooo cute! Some were slobbery and I didn't like that...and one scratched my face, but for the most part it was fun.

Anyways, if anyone needs to check if they are on the naughty or nice list this year, let me know and I'll hook you up. Me and Santa are pretty tight. Santa is a borderline creepster, but overall a pretty nice guy.

Side note: I bought my ticket to LA! It's official, I'm going. Makes me a little nervous, but I think it's going to be a good thing.

And last but not least, a shout out to my buddy Katy B, who's message made me smile real big tonight. Thanks Katy! :)

Ciao people.