So. A new friend told me about this hilarious thing she found on the internet: The 9 Real-Life Levels of Hell. It's pretty hilarious. And for the most part, it's true. Even though I personally can't relate to some of them. Jiffy Lube waiting room, for instance...I don't remember the last time I have been in one. Nor have I ever been in the emergency room at 1:00 am and I don't really spend all that much time in Kinkos. Also, Florida is awesome, I don't know what those fuckers are talking about. I was born there, so obviously, fantastic things come out of Florida. Seriously, all the things they listed are in other states. Even the Cubans...there was some protest here the other day that had to do with Cuban politics. I'm just sayin. Anyways, I also don't really have a lot of one year friends who's birthday parties I have to attend. They are pretty stupid, but I don't know that I would put it on my list of hellish places. Oh, what's that? You would like to hear my list of hellish places? Well, ok! I'll see how many I can come up with....
1. I have to agree on the Open Mic Night. Really anytime anyone busts out a guitar makes me cringe a little. I don't know what it is, but I just don't really like sitting around listening to one person play guitar and sing acoustic versions of cheesy songs. Which is weird because I freaking love music, even acoustic guitar music, but I don't like solo jam sessions. I think because it's usually a bunch of girls watching one guy play and it's just uncomfortable. Throw another guy in there and we might be ok. However, if it's at the beach or around a campfire, get me out of there! I think it's just too cliche or something for me. Or who knows really, I'm a weirdo. Whatever.
2. Dry Weddings. Sorry, but weddings are already hard enough to sit through as a slightly bitter single woman, and I definitely don't want to get to the reception and find out there is no booze involved. Do I sound like an alcoholic? I don't care, I want to get drunk for free so it's less painful to watch newly married couples slow dance!
3. Public Transportation. Now, the bus and metro are not always bad. In fact, they are just fine about 85% of the time. But it's that other 15% that is just painfully unbearable. Like today, for example, when this huge group of punk ass teenagers got on, caused a bunch of problems running their mouths and then refused to get off the bus when the bus driver told them to get off. So then we sat still for 15 minutes until they got off and then decided to stage a sit-in in front of the bus so we couldn't move without running them over (which I was all for). So we sat for another 10 minutes and then they screamed at the bus driver for a while and then we finally left. Definitely on the hellish side. There are few things more obnoxious than rude ass teenagers. Especially ones with that horrible teenager voice. You know what I'm talking about.
4. Being Stuck in a Room Watching Really Bad Television. And for me, this covers a lot of shows. In general, I am not a big fan of TV. Reality TV is the WORST. I seriously cannot STAND watching most of it. I especially hate the ones with all the drama and glorification of totally ridiculous people that no one should give two shits about, much less should have cameras following around their ridiculous selves. And I REALLY hate listening to people argue and that seems to happen a lot on reality TV shows involving families, contests and housemates. And sometimes I'm in other people's homes and they are watching this mess and it would be totally rude and socially unacceptable of me to leave based on their horrible taste in TV. That's when I fake a stomach ache and go to the bathroom for 30 minutes or until it's all over.
5. Crowded Grocery Stores. I am not a huge fan of crowds in the first place, but when it becomes an obstacle course just to pick up some groceries without running anyone over with my cart, things turn hellish. And in LA, that is pretty much always the case. For real, every time I have gone to the grocery store, there are a bazillion other people there and half of them are in line. And half of those are in the express line, under 15 items with at least 35 items in their cart. I saw a woman last week buying probably 50 bottles of coke. WHAT WAS SHE DOING WITH ALL THAT COKE????? Oh, and as a subtopic for number five, being behind someone paying with a check in the grocery store/pharmacy.
6. Dive Bars. They are always crowded (we know how I feel about those), occasionally have a one man acoustic guitar show going on with no dancing involved (vomit), it takes 10 years to get a crazy overpriced drink, and they usually smell funny and are full of stupid hipsters in skinny jeans. No thank you. And if there is karoke going on, please someone shoot me. I can't stand watching people make fools of themselves. And people always manage to pick the WORST songs! Singing Bohemien Rhaspody by yourself, karoke style, is just sad.
7. Anywhere Cold. But especially cold places in the morning. Like the bathroom. Hate it.
8. Being in an Awkward Conversations with People that Don't Agree With You. Obviously, I am smarter and more right than about 95% of the population, so this happens a lot. And it sucks. I just hate when I'm all, uggh, don't you just hate those pro-life crazies that throw eggs at people going into Planned Parenthood and then the person pulls a plastic fetus out of their pocket and says, this could have been a friend...until it was aborted. And then throws an egg in your face. So uncomfortable.
9. Movie Theaters/Libraries/Operas/Airplanes/Anywhere You're Supposed to be Relatively Quiet, with Loud People. Especially when it's the person you came with. I just want to yell, I'M RIGHT HERE-I CAN HEAR YOU. But that would make me just as bad.
Well what do you know, I was able to come up with 9. I'm sure I could come up with more if I tried a little harder. But I don't want to because I would rather go to bed. Also, if you read this and are offended, sorry, but these are my levels of hell and if you're made, write your own and include reading my blog in them. I dare you.
Tomorrow, I'll have my 9 levels of heaven, just so everyone doesn't think I'm a crazy bitch.
DREAM BIG! Write your Ellen letter! :)
30 March 2010
29 March 2010
Totally Awesome Weekend
Oh man, what a GOOD weekend! Sorry I have been so slack with the posting, but the days are just flying by! I was pretty busy this past week, big things have been going on! Here's a recap:
1. I went [indoor] skydiving! It was pretty cool! My friend got two tickets for FREE so we went and it was pretty amazing. Amazing that it was free because usually it's pretty pricey and amazing because you are pretty much just floating around in a wind tunnel. In my opinion, it wasn't really anything like real skydiving, but the woman that worked there said it's more like when you skydive by yourself. Not tandem skydiving, which is what I did before. Either way, it was super fun and a delightful treat. We got to ride around in luxury vans, got free food (and stale Diet Coke), and got the DVD with our "flight." So if you would ever like to see me in flight, just ask and we can have a viewing. It's really very exciting, I promise.
2. I went to the TOTALLY AWESOME 80s Gala on Saturday. And it really was, TOTALLY AWESOME. Mainly because Blakely and I had the most amazing outfits EVER (see facebook for details) and we were rocking out hardcore in the 80s working woman jumpsuit. It was glorious. We found them at the Salvation Army down the street and mine fit so perfectly, it was almost scary. It was like it was made just for me. Oh man, what if it had been made the year, or even day, I was born back in the 80s! That would be some crazyness. Anyways, the actual event was not too terribly exciting, but we met some nice people, got to groove to some 80s jams (my fave!), and now we get a FREE ticket to Disneyland!!! Exciting!!!! I love me some free stuff. I mean, I am all for volunteering and I am a big fan of helping others...and if I can get some free stuff in the process, I'll take it! So thanks Disney! I can't wait to go! I've heard good things. We also got free food and I took home two BA 80s posters for my new room. Which brings me to my next point...
3. I found an apartment! And it ended up working out really well because it is waaayyyy closer to where I work. I can literally walk to work faster than it takes me to get there on the bus now. And I think I'm going to get a bike, which will make things even faster and better! Also, there are regular grocery stores nearby that have cashiers that know English and the dairy section offers more than one type of cheese. So that's pretty exciting. The only minor problem is that it doesn't come furnished at all, but I'm hoping I can find some Goodwill deals and get my new room looking spiffy. And the best part is I get to have a housewarming party! Fun times.
Well it is time for bed. Big week ahead, flying to Florida on Wednesday! I have some fantastic friends and I am really pumped about seeing them!
Dream big people! [And write your Ellen letter!]
1. I went [indoor] skydiving! It was pretty cool! My friend got two tickets for FREE so we went and it was pretty amazing. Amazing that it was free because usually it's pretty pricey and amazing because you are pretty much just floating around in a wind tunnel. In my opinion, it wasn't really anything like real skydiving, but the woman that worked there said it's more like when you skydive by yourself. Not tandem skydiving, which is what I did before. Either way, it was super fun and a delightful treat. We got to ride around in luxury vans, got free food (and stale Diet Coke), and got the DVD with our "flight." So if you would ever like to see me in flight, just ask and we can have a viewing. It's really very exciting, I promise.
2. I went to the TOTALLY AWESOME 80s Gala on Saturday. And it really was, TOTALLY AWESOME. Mainly because Blakely and I had the most amazing outfits EVER (see facebook for details) and we were rocking out hardcore in the 80s working woman jumpsuit. It was glorious. We found them at the Salvation Army down the street and mine fit so perfectly, it was almost scary. It was like it was made just for me. Oh man, what if it had been made the year, or even day, I was born back in the 80s! That would be some crazyness. Anyways, the actual event was not too terribly exciting, but we met some nice people, got to groove to some 80s jams (my fave!), and now we get a FREE ticket to Disneyland!!! Exciting!!!! I love me some free stuff. I mean, I am all for volunteering and I am a big fan of helping others...and if I can get some free stuff in the process, I'll take it! So thanks Disney! I can't wait to go! I've heard good things. We also got free food and I took home two BA 80s posters for my new room. Which brings me to my next point...
3. I found an apartment! And it ended up working out really well because it is waaayyyy closer to where I work. I can literally walk to work faster than it takes me to get there on the bus now. And I think I'm going to get a bike, which will make things even faster and better! Also, there are regular grocery stores nearby that have cashiers that know English and the dairy section offers more than one type of cheese. So that's pretty exciting. The only minor problem is that it doesn't come furnished at all, but I'm hoping I can find some Goodwill deals and get my new room looking spiffy. And the best part is I get to have a housewarming party! Fun times.
Well it is time for bed. Big week ahead, flying to Florida on Wednesday! I have some fantastic friends and I am really pumped about seeing them!
Dream big people! [And write your Ellen letter!]
23 March 2010
Real Quick
Oh me, oh my. So much going on, so little time. But it's late and I need to watch my Ellen app, so I'll try to keep this brief.
I went to San Diego this weekend! It was really fun and is totally beautiful. And waaaaay cleaner than LA. The train ride down was quite lovely, a lot of it goes along the PCH so you get a nice beach view for a lot of it. Until you get back to LA, of course, and then you mainly see buildings, trash and cars. And people love trains! I saw so many people standing beside the tracks waving, it was fantastic! We even had some surfers waving from the water, I loved it! I hung out at the park and watched a crazy litte kids dance show...a friend's friend was the teacher, random, I know. Then we just hung out, enjoyed the lovely weather and had some beverages. And then the train ride back to dirty LA was just as lovely. And it was even better because of the totally verbose and crazy conductor, who was saying the most ridiculous things over the intercom. When we got back to LA he went on this whole thing about how you could take a break on the platform, stretch, have a smoke, stand on your head, run in circles, but when it comes time to get back on you better get on before the train disappears off into the horizon. Because you don't want to watching the train disappear off into the horizon, trying to run and jump on the train in vain. Really, he said all this. And more. Also, when we got to San Diego, he told everyone to watch out for trolleys because it would be "a shame to have gotten you here safely on the train only to have you collide with a trolley upon your arrival." Really.
Today was my morning bus driver's birthday, so the entire bus sang him Happy Birthday. How special is that? I know, so special. I don't know who found out or who started it, but once I realized once was going on, I could not stop smiling. I really just thought it was so cute and funny. LA surprises me like that every now and then. I was like, oh, it's not all crazy people, there are some nice ones too! But then I was reminded that there are more crazy people than nice ones when this man FREAKED OUT on the sidewalk outside my building. I could hear him screaming from the third floor! It was intense and I was a little afraid, even from inside, three stories up. From what I gathered from his rant was that someone bumped into him and things escalated from there. And ended with, "You better hope I don't run into in the dark sometime, where there are no witnesses to see how I would fuck you up!" Then something else about how he doesn't take shit from bullies and it's called SELF DEFENSE SIR. He said that to a man on his cell phone standing near by. Oohhh my. So crazy.
Anyways, there is tons of other stuff going on, but my brain is too scattered to put it all in word form right now. This weekend is the TOTALLY AWESOME 80s Gala and I am pumped! And then next week, I'm flying to Jacksonville for Trine's wedding. CRAZY. I really think I'll see some pigs flying along beside us on the way there. If you know what I'm saying.
Ok, well more later when I can get figure out how to write out my thoughts better.
Dream big people!
I went to San Diego this weekend! It was really fun and is totally beautiful. And waaaaay cleaner than LA. The train ride down was quite lovely, a lot of it goes along the PCH so you get a nice beach view for a lot of it. Until you get back to LA, of course, and then you mainly see buildings, trash and cars. And people love trains! I saw so many people standing beside the tracks waving, it was fantastic! We even had some surfers waving from the water, I loved it! I hung out at the park and watched a crazy litte kids dance show...a friend's friend was the teacher, random, I know. Then we just hung out, enjoyed the lovely weather and had some beverages. And then the train ride back to dirty LA was just as lovely. And it was even better because of the totally verbose and crazy conductor, who was saying the most ridiculous things over the intercom. When we got back to LA he went on this whole thing about how you could take a break on the platform, stretch, have a smoke, stand on your head, run in circles, but when it comes time to get back on you better get on before the train disappears off into the horizon. Because you don't want to watching the train disappear off into the horizon, trying to run and jump on the train in vain. Really, he said all this. And more. Also, when we got to San Diego, he told everyone to watch out for trolleys because it would be "a shame to have gotten you here safely on the train only to have you collide with a trolley upon your arrival." Really.
Today was my morning bus driver's birthday, so the entire bus sang him Happy Birthday. How special is that? I know, so special. I don't know who found out or who started it, but once I realized once was going on, I could not stop smiling. I really just thought it was so cute and funny. LA surprises me like that every now and then. I was like, oh, it's not all crazy people, there are some nice ones too! But then I was reminded that there are more crazy people than nice ones when this man FREAKED OUT on the sidewalk outside my building. I could hear him screaming from the third floor! It was intense and I was a little afraid, even from inside, three stories up. From what I gathered from his rant was that someone bumped into him and things escalated from there. And ended with, "You better hope I don't run into in the dark sometime, where there are no witnesses to see how I would fuck you up!" Then something else about how he doesn't take shit from bullies and it's called SELF DEFENSE SIR. He said that to a man on his cell phone standing near by. Oohhh my. So crazy.
Anyways, there is tons of other stuff going on, but my brain is too scattered to put it all in word form right now. This weekend is the TOTALLY AWESOME 80s Gala and I am pumped! And then next week, I'm flying to Jacksonville for Trine's wedding. CRAZY. I really think I'll see some pigs flying along beside us on the way there. If you know what I'm saying.
Ok, well more later when I can get figure out how to write out my thoughts better.
Dream big people!
18 March 2010
Erin Go Bragh!
Well. It's been a rough few days, but I think I'm over the worst and now here I am.
I have learned some interesting things from the news today. I'll share.
1. There was a study done that proves that women are attracted to men in luxury cars. I didn't read the article, that was just headline and now I can't find it. I guess I was just SO SHOCKED by this news, that I couldn't function properly. Seriously people, WHO KNEW??? These are some crazy times we are living in. Women are attracted to men with money. Total insanity.
2. "Aim to drink in moderation, or not at all, experts say." That is the advice the experts that spoke with CNN have to offer in the way of what to do about hangovers. Well thank you so much experts, that is so very practical and helpful of you! I, along with the bazillion other drinkers in this world, will most definitely keep that in mind as we celebrate tonight, and every other weekend (or weekday).
I had to stop reading after that. Is that really news? Who gets to decide what is news and what isn't? Those two things are less like news and more like useless information everyone in the whole wide world already knew.
If you are bored with reading the news and would like something interesting to do, here's a suggestion. Go to Google maps and look up walking directions for really obscure destinations in the world. For example, while planning my fake trip to Thailand the other night, Blakely and I discovered it would take us six days six hours to walk from Bangkok to Phuket. Totally do-able if you're looking to save some money on transportation on your way to Phi Phi.
And while Orb*** was nice enough to finally answer my questions, I am still frustrated because they, along with the airline company, really can't help me because they all suck and aren't interested in helping people out. ALL I WANT TO DO IS CHANGE TO A LATER FLIGHT. Why is this so hard? Whatever. At least they answered me. And I got to talk to a REAL person when I called the airlines-crazy!
Lastly, the weather is FANTASTIC here right now. For real, it's currently 81. Come visit, we'll hang at the beach!
HAPPY ST. PATRICKS DAY!!!!! I'll be having a drink (or 5) and cheersing to Pa tonight because this was his favorite holiday. So here's to Pa. Hope you are celebrating as well, we miss you!
Dream big people! Slainte!
PS-I won't really have 5 drinks. It's a school night crazy fools!
I have learned some interesting things from the news today. I'll share.
1. There was a study done that proves that women are attracted to men in luxury cars. I didn't read the article, that was just headline and now I can't find it. I guess I was just SO SHOCKED by this news, that I couldn't function properly. Seriously people, WHO KNEW??? These are some crazy times we are living in. Women are attracted to men with money. Total insanity.
2. "Aim to drink in moderation, or not at all, experts say." That is the advice the experts that spoke with CNN have to offer in the way of what to do about hangovers. Well thank you so much experts, that is so very practical and helpful of you! I, along with the bazillion other drinkers in this world, will most definitely keep that in mind as we celebrate tonight, and every other weekend (or weekday).
I had to stop reading after that. Is that really news? Who gets to decide what is news and what isn't? Those two things are less like news and more like useless information everyone in the whole wide world already knew.
If you are bored with reading the news and would like something interesting to do, here's a suggestion. Go to Google maps and look up walking directions for really obscure destinations in the world. For example, while planning my fake trip to Thailand the other night, Blakely and I discovered it would take us six days six hours to walk from Bangkok to Phuket. Totally do-able if you're looking to save some money on transportation on your way to Phi Phi.
And while Orb*** was nice enough to finally answer my questions, I am still frustrated because they, along with the airline company, really can't help me because they all suck and aren't interested in helping people out. ALL I WANT TO DO IS CHANGE TO A LATER FLIGHT. Why is this so hard? Whatever. At least they answered me. And I got to talk to a REAL person when I called the airlines-crazy!
Lastly, the weather is FANTASTIC here right now. For real, it's currently 81. Come visit, we'll hang at the beach!
HAPPY ST. PATRICKS DAY!!!!! I'll be having a drink (or 5) and cheersing to Pa tonight because this was his favorite holiday. So here's to Pa. Hope you are celebrating as well, we miss you!
Dream big people! Slainte!
PS-I won't really have 5 drinks. It's a school night crazy fools!
17 March 2010
15 March 2010
Whoopsie Daisy
So this was a weekend of some very poor decision making. I won't get into all the details, but things were said, actions were done and money (lots of money) was spent that shouldn't have been. But not all by choice. Damn. Well that is in the past I guess. Cosi e la vita!
There were some good parts, though. I went to the Spanish grocery store across the street by myself and it actually went pretty well! I was proud of myself. I got into some crazy exclusive Korean restaurant and it was interesting. Seriously, they almost didn't let us in because we were white, even though we had a Korean with us. There are some exclusive people out here. Don't let anyone trick you into thinking Los Angeles is a city of open arms. Does anyone even say this? I don't know. Either way, it's actually kind of the opposite and it can get a little depressing sometimes. I will say, though, that once we were in, most everyone was nice to us. The waitress even made sure we ordered white people friendly dishes. How thoughtful of her. And then they over-charged us by about $50, so that was lovely too.
Also, Orbitz sucks and I am very upset with them right now. I love flying, but booking flights is the biggest pain in my ass and, as always, I need to change things but can't and now have some whack flight that would cost some retarded amount of money that I don't have, to change. Grrrrr. Is it so much to ask that airlines make their business customer friendly? Apparently yes. And I'm thinking it's only going to get worse seeing as the demand for flying is always going to be there and businesses don't really give a crap about their customers, only about making money. I heard something the other day about an airline considering making people pay to use the bathroom on board. Totally unacceptable! Ok. Rant over.
Anyways, the weather was super fantastic this weekend and it's supposed to get even better this week and that makes me excited. And with daylight savings, that means I can enjoy the beach for a little bit after work and not have to get on the bus while it's dark. Hooray!
Also, if you haven't written your Ellen letter, get on it! I only have until May when I go back and she needs as many letters as soon as possible. I don't care if you think I'm crazy, at least drop a postcard in the mail! And if you have, THANK YOU! I love you and think you're awesome.
That's all I got, really. Sorry nothing exciting is going. Possible trip to San Diego next weekend. Potential for exciting things to happen! We'll see.
Dream BIG, people :)
There were some good parts, though. I went to the Spanish grocery store across the street by myself and it actually went pretty well! I was proud of myself. I got into some crazy exclusive Korean restaurant and it was interesting. Seriously, they almost didn't let us in because we were white, even though we had a Korean with us. There are some exclusive people out here. Don't let anyone trick you into thinking Los Angeles is a city of open arms. Does anyone even say this? I don't know. Either way, it's actually kind of the opposite and it can get a little depressing sometimes. I will say, though, that once we were in, most everyone was nice to us. The waitress even made sure we ordered white people friendly dishes. How thoughtful of her. And then they over-charged us by about $50, so that was lovely too.
Also, Orbitz sucks and I am very upset with them right now. I love flying, but booking flights is the biggest pain in my ass and, as always, I need to change things but can't and now have some whack flight that would cost some retarded amount of money that I don't have, to change. Grrrrr. Is it so much to ask that airlines make their business customer friendly? Apparently yes. And I'm thinking it's only going to get worse seeing as the demand for flying is always going to be there and businesses don't really give a crap about their customers, only about making money. I heard something the other day about an airline considering making people pay to use the bathroom on board. Totally unacceptable! Ok. Rant over.
Anyways, the weather was super fantastic this weekend and it's supposed to get even better this week and that makes me excited. And with daylight savings, that means I can enjoy the beach for a little bit after work and not have to get on the bus while it's dark. Hooray!
Also, if you haven't written your Ellen letter, get on it! I only have until May when I go back and she needs as many letters as soon as possible. I don't care if you think I'm crazy, at least drop a postcard in the mail! And if you have, THANK YOU! I love you and think you're awesome.
That's all I got, really. Sorry nothing exciting is going. Possible trip to San Diego next weekend. Potential for exciting things to happen! We'll see.
Dream BIG, people :)
10 March 2010
Laugh. Dance. Hire Jacky.
So here goes. The first round of pleas for letters have gone out. MAJOR finger crossing going on. Mainly that I don't look like a total fool. I guess it's a little to late for that though. Anyways, here is what you can write, if you want:
"I have known Miss Jacky G for _________ years/months/days [have never actually met her, but have heard good things] and I truly feel she would make a great asset to the Ellen team, in any capacity. But most especially as an Ellen ambassador to the international community. Traveling is a true passion of Jacky's, as are laughing and dancing, which are pretty consistent with the priorities of Ellen. Jacky is a huge Ellen fan and would spread the message of Ellen with true heart. As an American/Italian/Armenian/other international person, I feel as though Jacky would represent both America and Ellen proudly, and would be welcome in my country/community of ________ to spread Ellen love. If anything, you could give Jeannie a raise and let Jacky have her old job. Jacky's current job does not showcase her potential as a catalyst in a world domination movement. Thank you for your time and consideration. I love watching your show and hope to see Jacky's smiling face on there one day. Y'all are both totally _________ and I know she would represent The Ellen Show in the best way possible. Laugh. Dance. Hire Jacky.
Love from _____(your country/community)___, sign your name. :)"
Email or facebook me for the address. I don't know if I should put it on here, I don't want to get in any kind of trouble. Also, if you know ANYONE that would participate, let me know and I will send them an email! I need lots of people from all around the world, so your help is much appreciated. Also, feel free to send a postcard, take a picture, or call up Ellen and tell her your thoughts. Whatever you want to do.
[Help me] Dream big people!
"I have known Miss Jacky G for _________ years/months/days [have never actually met her, but have heard good things] and I truly feel she would make a great asset to the Ellen team, in any capacity. But most especially as an Ellen ambassador to the international community. Traveling is a true passion of Jacky's, as are laughing and dancing, which are pretty consistent with the priorities of Ellen. Jacky is a huge Ellen fan and would spread the message of Ellen with true heart. As an American/Italian/Armenian/other international person, I feel as though Jacky would represent both America and Ellen proudly, and would be welcome in my country/community of ________ to spread Ellen love. If anything, you could give Jeannie a raise and let Jacky have her old job. Jacky's current job does not showcase her potential as a catalyst in a world domination movement. Thank you for your time and consideration. I love watching your show and hope to see Jacky's smiling face on there one day. Y'all are both totally _________ and I know she would represent The Ellen Show in the best way possible. Laugh. Dance. Hire Jacky.
Love from _____(your country/community)___, sign your name. :)"
Email or facebook me for the address. I don't know if I should put it on here, I don't want to get in any kind of trouble. Also, if you know ANYONE that would participate, let me know and I will send them an email! I need lots of people from all around the world, so your help is much appreciated. Also, feel free to send a postcard, take a picture, or call up Ellen and tell her your thoughts. Whatever you want to do.
[Help me] Dream big people!
09 March 2010
I'm loving it!
I need a new theme for titles....they have been struggling as of late.
Today was a FANTASTIC day! I know you are just dying to know why, so calm down, I'm going to tell you!
The bus ride to work was (relatively) normal and uneventful. There were some awkward teenagers sitting and standing all around me but, good things came out of it. The girl in the blue checked pants, bright green t-shirt and plaid over shirt made me really glad I am not a teenager anymore. Oh, and the braces. Man, braces were the worst!
Work was...actually, not that fantastic. We'll skip that. Even though I did get an email at work that made me laugh for like, 10 minutes. Out loud. I also got some emails that made me want to punch the computer. But I didn't. It would probably hurt. Oh, and I got to read all the hilarious Oscar commentary online and that made me laugh out loud some more. People are so funny.
As I was walking back from giving my tour for the new students, a gas station was blasting "I Can't Go For That (No Can Do)" by Hall & Oates and it made me smile. Mainly because Blakely and I had a Hall & Oates mini-fest the other night and we were dueting (is that a word?) that song all last week. Good times.
After work, I walked myself down the skreet and joined Curves! Yay me! And it was just lovely because the people were nice and the crazy "change stations now" person sounds the same as it does in good ole Mt. P. Made me feel right at home.
Then, I got back on the bus and rode home without anything majorly weird happening AND I got to see cute-guy-that-gets-off-at-my-stop guy. So special. BONUS-he was there in the morning too! I forgot. OH, and, I went into the grocery store on the way to Curves and after the grocery store guy showed me where something was, he told me I looked "so sexy" with my short haircut. I was embarassed/thrilled/awkward/extremely pleased with myself. And he was relatively normal looking too! Had all of his teeth and everything! If that doesn't get your afternoon started right, I don't know what will. BONUS-that is the second time I've gotten hit on in a grocery store. DOUBLE BONUS-I freaking love grocery shopping and things like that only make it better.
Oh, and the crazy lady in the building next door was really entertaining tonight. She was doing a little dance in her doorway and then her cat escaped and she ran after it and said, (verbatim) "Get back here-I'll fuck you up!" And it was both hysterical and disturbing. Then I stopped watching her because I didn't want her to see me and fuck me up as well. If I have learned anything in this life, it's to not mess with people that do drugs. When they say they will fuck you up, they sometimes mean it. And when they do mean it, they really will, in a big way. No thank you.
I also was reminded that I have super awesome friends (especially the ones that read my blog!) and I am getting really pumped about my letter writing campaign. I think it could be good. Fingers crossed.
And now I get to go to sleep in my cozy little bed!
Dream big!
PS-my Ellen countdown gave my blog a virus...so that shit had to go. But I think we are at 57 days right now. Get excited!
Today was a FANTASTIC day! I know you are just dying to know why, so calm down, I'm going to tell you!
The bus ride to work was (relatively) normal and uneventful. There were some awkward teenagers sitting and standing all around me but, good things came out of it. The girl in the blue checked pants, bright green t-shirt and plaid over shirt made me really glad I am not a teenager anymore. Oh, and the braces. Man, braces were the worst!
Work was...actually, not that fantastic. We'll skip that. Even though I did get an email at work that made me laugh for like, 10 minutes. Out loud. I also got some emails that made me want to punch the computer. But I didn't. It would probably hurt. Oh, and I got to read all the hilarious Oscar commentary online and that made me laugh out loud some more. People are so funny.
As I was walking back from giving my tour for the new students, a gas station was blasting "I Can't Go For That (No Can Do)" by Hall & Oates and it made me smile. Mainly because Blakely and I had a Hall & Oates mini-fest the other night and we were dueting (is that a word?) that song all last week. Good times.
After work, I walked myself down the skreet and joined Curves! Yay me! And it was just lovely because the people were nice and the crazy "change stations now" person sounds the same as it does in good ole Mt. P. Made me feel right at home.
Then, I got back on the bus and rode home without anything majorly weird happening AND I got to see cute-guy-that-gets-off-at-my-stop guy. So special. BONUS-he was there in the morning too! I forgot. OH, and, I went into the grocery store on the way to Curves and after the grocery store guy showed me where something was, he told me I looked "so sexy" with my short haircut. I was embarassed/thrilled/awkward/extremely pleased with myself. And he was relatively normal looking too! Had all of his teeth and everything! If that doesn't get your afternoon started right, I don't know what will. BONUS-that is the second time I've gotten hit on in a grocery store. DOUBLE BONUS-I freaking love grocery shopping and things like that only make it better.
Oh, and the crazy lady in the building next door was really entertaining tonight. She was doing a little dance in her doorway and then her cat escaped and she ran after it and said, (verbatim) "Get back here-I'll fuck you up!" And it was both hysterical and disturbing. Then I stopped watching her because I didn't want her to see me and fuck me up as well. If I have learned anything in this life, it's to not mess with people that do drugs. When they say they will fuck you up, they sometimes mean it. And when they do mean it, they really will, in a big way. No thank you.
I also was reminded that I have super awesome friends (especially the ones that read my blog!) and I am getting really pumped about my letter writing campaign. I think it could be good. Fingers crossed.
And now I get to go to sleep in my cozy little bed!
Dream big!
PS-my Ellen countdown gave my blog a virus...so that shit had to go. But I think we are at 57 days right now. Get excited!
08 March 2010
So many people to thank...
Here's whats up: I am awesome at driving in LA. Seriously, I am pretty much a pro already and I've only driven like, three times. But I'm amazing. Does this really surprise anyone? Probably not because I'm awesome at pretty much everything. Except picking up boys. And telling jokes. And painting fingernails. And driving big trucks in parking garages. But other than that, total awesomeness. Now I just need a car. I'm trying to convince one of the Spanish boys at school to give me the one he is going to buy for his 3 month stay here. Come on now, the person is clearly loaded if he can come to the US, rent an apartment for three months, buy a car AND an iphone. And clearly, he can afford to be nice and leave the car for me, his loyal and helpful housing and admissions coordinator that gave him a kick ass tour of Santa Monica upon his arrival to the school. But, if that doesn't work out, I am going to figure out how to win a car. Or hotwire one. Whichever takes less time. I just love driving so much and I miss it! Damn you cars, for being so expensive!
So in other news, the Oscars were tonight! And that would be more exciting if I actually did something cool and LA and went to them or at least tried to go see the red carpet, but I didn't. I actually forgot they were even going on until someone texted me and asked if I was going. By that time it was too late and then I couldn't find anyone that wanted to go crash post parties with me. Everyone here is totally lame, obvi. I did watch part of them on TV and now I really want to win an Oscar and wear a pretty dress and give a cool speech. As ridiculous as I think celebrity and movie culture is, there are still some things I liked. (SPOLIER ALERT!) I love that Sandra Bullock won. She is really funny and I like her movies. I think it's great a woman won for best director even though I didn't see her movie and probably never will because it looks a little too intense for my taste. And if people love Gabby Sibawhatever, they will LOVE me. For reals. I am totally cool, just like her! We would be really good friends and she could introduce me to Oprah, who could then introduce me to Ellen. Ellen could be for me what Oprah is for her. How perfect does that sound? I thought so too. Ugh, I would be so GOOD at being famous, I just know it!! How do I make this happen? Also, I felt totally cultured because I had seen TWO of the foreign language movie nominees....not the one that won, but whatevs. How many have YOU seen? Exactly. That is also the number of regular best picture nominees I have seen. I was totally rooting for "Up." Such a cute movie!
That's it for me I guess. Kind of an uneventful weekend. I did get to wear my new shoes though! And they were every bit as fabulous as I had hoped! This is what I would like to say about the weekend, Oscar acceptance speech style:
I would like to thank Ikea for making such comfy bed and cozy sheets for me to spend nearly half the day in, both Saturday and Sunday. Thank you to Sephora for replacing the make-up I dropped on the floor and broke for no extra charge. A special thanks to Target for providing pretty much my entire wardobe, including my kick-ass new shoes that made me almost a normal height. Also, thank you Fatburger for being such good hangover food, Pandora for providing me with such great random musical selections and the awesome California weather for making driving around with sun roof open a viable and fantastic option today. Oh, what's that? Hurry up? I'm almost out of time? Ok, oh gosh, so many things left to thank! I guess I'd like to just dedicate this weekend everyone out there that knows what it's like to sleep in and then get up and do nothing productive. Oh, and the academy. Thanks for making all this a reality.
Dream big people.
So in other news, the Oscars were tonight! And that would be more exciting if I actually did something cool and LA and went to them or at least tried to go see the red carpet, but I didn't. I actually forgot they were even going on until someone texted me and asked if I was going. By that time it was too late and then I couldn't find anyone that wanted to go crash post parties with me. Everyone here is totally lame, obvi. I did watch part of them on TV and now I really want to win an Oscar and wear a pretty dress and give a cool speech. As ridiculous as I think celebrity and movie culture is, there are still some things I liked. (SPOLIER ALERT!) I love that Sandra Bullock won. She is really funny and I like her movies. I think it's great a woman won for best director even though I didn't see her movie and probably never will because it looks a little too intense for my taste. And if people love Gabby Sibawhatever, they will LOVE me. For reals. I am totally cool, just like her! We would be really good friends and she could introduce me to Oprah, who could then introduce me to Ellen. Ellen could be for me what Oprah is for her. How perfect does that sound? I thought so too. Ugh, I would be so GOOD at being famous, I just know it!! How do I make this happen? Also, I felt totally cultured because I had seen TWO of the foreign language movie nominees....not the one that won, but whatevs. How many have YOU seen? Exactly. That is also the number of regular best picture nominees I have seen. I was totally rooting for "Up." Such a cute movie!
That's it for me I guess. Kind of an uneventful weekend. I did get to wear my new shoes though! And they were every bit as fabulous as I had hoped! This is what I would like to say about the weekend, Oscar acceptance speech style:
I would like to thank Ikea for making such comfy bed and cozy sheets for me to spend nearly half the day in, both Saturday and Sunday. Thank you to Sephora for replacing the make-up I dropped on the floor and broke for no extra charge. A special thanks to Target for providing pretty much my entire wardobe, including my kick-ass new shoes that made me almost a normal height. Also, thank you Fatburger for being such good hangover food, Pandora for providing me with such great random musical selections and the awesome California weather for making driving around with sun roof open a viable and fantastic option today. Oh, what's that? Hurry up? I'm almost out of time? Ok, oh gosh, so many things left to thank! I guess I'd like to just dedicate this weekend everyone out there that knows what it's like to sleep in and then get up and do nothing productive. Oh, and the academy. Thanks for making all this a reality.
Dream big people.
05 March 2010
Climbing
So here is how awesome I am right now: I am currently listening to "The Climb" by Miley Cyrus on Pandora radio. Damn, I'm so cool. I would skip it but I have used up all my skips for the moment. But I agree Miley, I goootttaa be strong and just keep pushing on. She's pretty wise for being a minor.
Anyways, the bus was SO horrible today. I wish cars weren't so dang expensive cause I would buy one, like, yesterday. I got on at a weird time again today (I never learn my lesson!) and a lot of the seats were soaking wet! It was disgusting. I think they had just been cleaned or something, but still..it was gross. So I sit in a dry seat next to a wet seat but it was awkward because the wet seat was the window, so I looked like a jerk not scooting over for people. And it got super crowded so every time people got on, they were all, why is no one sitting there? And I had to keep being like, the seat is wet! Sorry! And some people didn't want to believe me for whatever reason, so I would have to get halfway up and let them see for themselves. It was not pleasant. And on top of that, these horribly stinky, nasty, very high and very obnoxious people got on and were grossing me out the whole time. They smelled so bad and were being so annoying. There was a girl who had three huge pieces of luggage that kept hitting people in the face and her friend, this huge nasty boy was all over the back of my seat and I was not pleased. I was very happy to get off that mess. And the worst part was I missed the bus before it by a block, so it all could have been avoided if I had left just a few minutes earlier. Damn.
Anyways, my computer is broke as a joke and it's depressing. To cheer me up, I bought these super fabulous shoes from Target and I am really pumped about wearing them out. Haha, it's funny because they ARE pumps! Good one, I know.
OH! And today I signed up for the Disney Volunteer day-so excited! I wanted to do Habitat for Humanity but I found the MOST PERFECT thing instead. It's to be a volunteer to an TOTALLY AWESOME 80s GALA. AHHHH!!! Can you even stand it! I think it will be TOTALLY AWESOME...I'm excited!
I think I'll stop now. I'm watching my Ellen app and I can't do two things at once. Plus I'm getting crazy jealous and need to think of hidden talent ASAP. Or get on that letter writing. PS-fitting in a suitcase is not a talent. But it's really funny to watch Ellen drag you around. Holy crap, now a woman is juggling a table with her feet! I can never top that. Sigh.
Dream big people! And write a letter for me!
Anyways, the bus was SO horrible today. I wish cars weren't so dang expensive cause I would buy one, like, yesterday. I got on at a weird time again today (I never learn my lesson!) and a lot of the seats were soaking wet! It was disgusting. I think they had just been cleaned or something, but still..it was gross. So I sit in a dry seat next to a wet seat but it was awkward because the wet seat was the window, so I looked like a jerk not scooting over for people. And it got super crowded so every time people got on, they were all, why is no one sitting there? And I had to keep being like, the seat is wet! Sorry! And some people didn't want to believe me for whatever reason, so I would have to get halfway up and let them see for themselves. It was not pleasant. And on top of that, these horribly stinky, nasty, very high and very obnoxious people got on and were grossing me out the whole time. They smelled so bad and were being so annoying. There was a girl who had three huge pieces of luggage that kept hitting people in the face and her friend, this huge nasty boy was all over the back of my seat and I was not pleased. I was very happy to get off that mess. And the worst part was I missed the bus before it by a block, so it all could have been avoided if I had left just a few minutes earlier. Damn.
Anyways, my computer is broke as a joke and it's depressing. To cheer me up, I bought these super fabulous shoes from Target and I am really pumped about wearing them out. Haha, it's funny because they ARE pumps! Good one, I know.
OH! And today I signed up for the Disney Volunteer day-so excited! I wanted to do Habitat for Humanity but I found the MOST PERFECT thing instead. It's to be a volunteer to an TOTALLY AWESOME 80s GALA. AHHHH!!! Can you even stand it! I think it will be TOTALLY AWESOME...I'm excited!
I think I'll stop now. I'm watching my Ellen app and I can't do two things at once. Plus I'm getting crazy jealous and need to think of hidden talent ASAP. Or get on that letter writing. PS-fitting in a suitcase is not a talent. But it's really funny to watch Ellen drag you around. Holy crap, now a woman is juggling a table with her feet! I can never top that. Sigh.
Dream big people! And write a letter for me!
02 March 2010
Have a little fun today!
I had A LOT of fun today because I went to the ELLEN SHOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And it was fantastic. I'm going to be honest with y'all though, I was a little upset. We didn't get into the actual audience because we got there too late (and some of you probably weren't crossing your fingers hard enough..jk) and the Riff Raff room was a little disappointing. I was literally crossing my fingers the entire time we were in line (I probably looked like such an idiot) but it just wasn't in the cards for me today. Don't get me wrong, I had a great time and loved it a lot, but Riff Raffers don't get no love! No shout out or a peek inside or anything! Well that's not true I guess because we got a shirt. But some of the other Raffers were SO LAME! Some sat the entire time and someo of them weren't even smiling! I couldn't stop smiling! There was one lady, though, who was both fabulous and very strange. She was busting some moves pretty hard. Others weren't really though....a lot of people just sat there. And the worst part was they had these big screens up where you could watch the show and they showed the "real" audience dancing before it started and some people were being soooooooo LAME. Seriously, some people were just standing there, not dancing at all! I wanted to ask the staff if they could go pull the lame-os and replace them with awesome people (ie: Blakely and I) who would appreciate the experience better. However, I didn't ask so we stayed put. Blakely and I both got up on the furniture (we had permission!) and were totally breaking it down, so we had a blast. One of the staff guys was a dancing fool too and it was hilarious. We also had a congo line, which I am normally against, but something just came over me! It was good times. However, I'm not going to lie, when Ellen came out and was up on the big screen, I teared up a little. I KNOW-sooo pathetic, but I really really REALLY wanted to be in that audience. BUT-the good news is we got re-booked for guaranteed seats in May and I don't want to get too ahead of myself, but I think it's going to be a REALLY good show.
Our show was good too. We got a sneak preview of the finale of a show (I don't know if I'm legally allowed to say anything about yet...seriously, we had to sign something) that I don't normally watch and it was a little painful. But, it was still cool to get to see it before everyone else. The guests were Lindsey Vonn, who is super pretty and gave everyone (including the Riff Raffers!) a free t-shirt that Blakely and I wore on our afternoon walk. Yes, we were matching and trying to make people think we were Olympic athletes. Lauren Graham was also there and she is really funny and really terrible at Pictionary. There was also a woman who Ellen discovered on YouTube and was PHENOMENAL. She was unbelievable! And super cute. And Ellen talked to the audience at the very end and it was special. On commercial breaks the screens didn't show us what was going on onstage, but I think there were some dance contests or something with the audience members, I don't know. I bought a shirt that is extremely comfy and Blakely won a shirt for dancing like a go-go girl.
Anyways, the whole thing was super fun and it just makes me love Ellen even more. And makes me want to be her international ambassador EVEN MORE. So what I think I'm going to do is start a letter/email writing campaign. I am going to get people from all over the world (and US) to send in something on my behalf saying that I would make a good Ellen diplomat. If you're interested, let me know. And if you know people in other countries that would do it too, let me know! I don't know if this will work, but I'm going to at least try. Should be interesting.
So that was Ellen. Oh yeah! Since we were Riff Raffers, we were the first people to leave and get out of the parking garage and we saw her driving! She was turning right and we were turning left and were like, right behind her! And we were trying to wave at her and then we noticed some security people in the car behind her (next to us) looking sternly at us. Then he rolled down his window so we stopped immediately. I mean, we were just trying to get a wave! Calm down. The security guy was ridiculously hot too, so that just made it more embarrassing. Oh well.
Also, I got to drive to work today and it was soooo great. It took HALF the time on the bus, wasn't sketchy and annoying and there were no funny smells involved. I REALLY wish I had a car. And a non-broken computer. But that is for another day.
Well, I've got two months to get my letter writing campaign up and running. Any help would be appreciated. Thanks to everyone that has been so supportive and interested in my Ellen experience, y'all are awesome.
Dream big people! :)
01 March 2010
AHHHHHHHHHHH
Sooo, this weekend pretty much sucked hardcore. Among other stupid things, I broke my new makeup and my computer, church made me horribly sad and I realized a lot of people suck. And I HATE when I realize people suck! You know, you're going along...thinking things are fine and then there is that moment where you're like, awwww man, this person sucks. And what are you gonna do? Oh well. Keep looking for non-sucky people I guess. And ugggh, I'm so depressed about my computer. Daaaaammmmnnnnnnn it.
BUT-things got better today. Blakely and I went to the beach and it was sooo beautiful and so fun. Sadly, I did not take my camera or I would show you. Then we had a super fabulous dinner involving yummy guacamole. However, my dumb self drank WAY to much soda. And by that, I mean a glass. And now I am super crazy wired because soda makes me a crazy person. I'm having trouble typing this. So I'll wrap it up.
ELLEN IS TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am so excited, I seriously can't even stand IT! AHHHHHH!!!!! Ok, I'm going to pick out an outfit, make a playlist and cross everything possible that we actually get in the audience and then she notices me and offers me a job.
DREAM HUGE PEOPLE!
BUT-things got better today. Blakely and I went to the beach and it was sooo beautiful and so fun. Sadly, I did not take my camera or I would show you. Then we had a super fabulous dinner involving yummy guacamole. However, my dumb self drank WAY to much soda. And by that, I mean a glass. And now I am super crazy wired because soda makes me a crazy person. I'm having trouble typing this. So I'll wrap it up.
ELLEN IS TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am so excited, I seriously can't even stand IT! AHHHHHH!!!!! Ok, I'm going to pick out an outfit, make a playlist and cross everything possible that we actually get in the audience and then she notices me and offers me a job.
DREAM HUGE PEOPLE!
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