Useless

I have felt so lazy today. I'm a little embarrassed to admit that I have done next to nothing on this lovely Sunday. I haven't been sleeping that well lately. I have been having completely wacked out dreams and woke up uncomfortably early today. Which is such a shame because sleeping in is what I look forward to most on the weekend.

Right now I do not feel like writing this post. I feel like going to McDonald's and getting an iced coffee. I have been craving it like mad. But a lot has been happening lately and I know you people are just dying to find out what that has been. So here we go.

We attempted a pub crawl Wednesday night and I was thinking things would not be that great at school on Thursday. SO WRONG. We had our Halloween party on Thursday and it was beyond fabulous. Almost all of the students dressed up, we carved pumpkins, played games, stuck our hands in random things, it was magical. The best part? I think all the students had a really good time. Success!

And then, Ellen was so far beyond fantastic on Wednesday. I laughed really hard. Then Tony fell off his stool and I laughed even harder. If you missed it, I suggest you figure out a way to watch David Beckham pull a hidden camera prank. It is not only hilarious, but he takes off his shirt so it's eye candy as well. Delicious and nutritious.

Friday I was going to see Betty White at Barnes and Noble but thennnnn, I went and they told me I had to buy her book in order to go meet her. Don't get me wrong, I love me some Betty White. LOVE HER. However, I was really hungry and decided I would buy myself dinner rather than buy her book and stand in the really long line that had already formed. Sorry Betty! Nothing but love! I went home and watched Golden Girls on TV so I'm sure she forgives me.

Friday I also learned that queso fundido is not the same as queso cheese dip like they serve at every Mexican restaurant at home. I have yet to find queso dip here in LA. It's very sad.

Saturday involved some shopping, where I bought these super awesome shoes: [picture currently unavailable]

Then I went to a Halloween party dressed as Blanche from the Golden Girls. Now, I know this looks bad. First, I go blow off Betty for dinner and then I dress up as her friend. I'm sorry Betty! Just know that I have Blanche hair and I have never seen you in a jumpsuit. Season 1, Blanche was definitely sporting a jumpsuit. Please don't be offended.

Anyway, the party was fun. Today I've done nothing and I feel completely useless. But, there is a Rob and Big marathon on and I've got to figure out costume #3 to wear to the Halloween parade in West Hollywood tonight. Pretty excited!! More later on how that went. Going to be part of a record breaking Time Warp dance for the 35th anniversary of The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Should be interesting.

Dream big people!

How Rude!

Stephanie Tanner style. Pre-meth addiction.

Ok, so I know I've been a posting fool lately. This new computer is so small and handy, I can take it anywhere and it doesn't take a thousand years to load the internet, so I can just hop on and post something! Basically, what I'm saying, is that you need to say thank you to my new computer for the influx of posts. If my computer could talk, it would say you're welcome (not please). I think my computer needs a name.

Anyway. This post is about common courtesies that I think everyone should have.

1. Putting a new toilet paper on when the old one runs out. It is NOT that difficult.

2. Refilling the water pitcher after you take some water. Get with it, roommates and coworkers.

3. Responding to emails/texts/etc. It's 2010 friends. The turn around time for response is 2-3 days max, even less if the original message demands a response. I know you read that shit.

4. Getting off the bus at the back door. People are trying to get on through the front door. There is a reason there is a back door.

5. Taking your laundry out a reasonable time after it's finished. Other people would like to dry their clothes as well.

6. Closing your door in a quiet manner when others are sleeping.

7. Getting up from your seat when you're sitting in the aisle and the window person needs to get out. Do not make me scoot by! Get your lazy ass up! Oh man, I could make a whole new list for bus etiquette. People are redic.

8. Letting other people that only have a few items go ahead of you when you are buying an excessive amount of bottled water. And/or are writing a check for your purchases. A check? Seriously?

9. Getting off your phone when you are ordering food and/or paying for something. Show some respect.

10. Saying please and thank you. It goes a long way.

I'll stop but I could probably write 50 of these. For now, I'm going to watch Private Practice. I found out yesterday it's taped in Santa Monica, right around where I work. The exterior shot of the building they work in is right on the corner! Super exciting, I know.

Dream big people!

Different Strokes

Last night I met a guy from Illinois and we were discussing how LA is different from the places we are from. Then I decided to do a blog post about it. So here you go.

Most obvious: Driving
Dear god, the traffic here is atrocious. Obviously, being car-less, I don't have to deal with traffic a whole lot, thank GOODNESS. However, I do encounter it on the bus, while riding with other people, and the few times I've driven. It's so ridiculous. And at pretty much all hours of the day and night. People are such bad drivers too, it's insane. And if it's raining, don't even bother. People FREAK out. You almost have to be a crazy person to get anywhere. I know everyone has a place other than where they are from that has the worst drivers, but because there are so many drivers out here, there is a higher ratio of bad to good ones. I think. Also, I think there are just tons of bad drivers all over the place and you really just can't escape them. For me, worst drivers ever: Greece. I literally feared for my life every time I was in a car.

Most annoying: Parking
Again, not my biggest problem since I don't have a car. But pretty much every time I ride somewhere with someone, parking is an issue. You can't park on the street on certain days during certain hours. You can only park for 15 minutes, you have to pay the meter, it's a loading only zone, you can only park if you're going to a certain business, you have to pay $5-20, the list goes on and on. The one that makes me the most mad is this stupid pretentious coffee shop up the street from my house. It has valet parking at all hours of the day, including 6:00 in the morning. WTF?? I guess my country bumpkin mind always assumed valet parking was for fancier places and only at dinner. That coffee shop has a lot of nerve and therefore, I never go in. Also, it's crazy expensive.

Most baffling: Dancing
The scene: Applebees, Jacksonville Florida. Cupid's Shuffle comes on. Literally every single person there rushes to the "dance floor" (this was an after hours Applebees...free drinks for ladies night) and does the dance. Same reaction to every wedding I've ever been to. The Cupid's Shuffle will get people to the dance floor every time.
New scene: Bar in Westwood (where UCLA is). Cupid's Shuffle comes on. NO ONE even bats an eye. NO ONE is doing the dance. I don't even think anyone noticed it was playing. I was most upset. Come on people, it's not hard! It tells you exactly what to do!

Most unacceptable: Food
This is America, dammit! Land of the 18 wheeler and cookie cutter commercialism. I should be able to get the same food here that I get at home. The closest Chic-Fil-A is like, 30 minutes away. Unacceptable. McDonald's is the only place you can get sweet tea. Unacceptable. The closest Cracker Barrel is in Texas and the closest Waffle House in Arizona. UNACCEPTABLE. Also, the seafood out here is really expensive and not even good. Weaksauce, California.

Most annoying, part two: Landlords
Fridge broke in Charleston: Landlord bought us a new one.
Fridge broke in LA: Sorry, not our problem, even though the fridge was here when we got here and we have to leave it here after we're gone. Eastern Europeans come to fix it and are super upset with me when I decline their offer.

That is all I can really think of for now. And don't worry, even with all it's nonsense, I am having a good time in LA and can deal with all it's ridiculousness. I think that is the charm in traveling and living in new places. The things you find stupid about your new place, you can commiserate with other implants and tell locals how much better things are at home. And the things that are better, you can tell everyone at home and make them jealous. It's a win-win! For instance, next week, I'm going to Jimmy Kimmel live with a FREE concert by Huey Lewis and the News! Parking will be a bitch, but it'll be an awesome concert!

Dream big people!

Rose and Thorn II

Rose and thorn (and bud) is going to be my new lazy post for when I'm too tired/lazy/uninspired to think of a title but still feel like sharing. So here we go.

Thorn: the damn fridge broke! Son of a bitch, so everything in the fridge went bad. Including my two bottles of free wine! That is what I'm most upset about. That, and all the food I recently bought. But mainly the wine.

Rose: Successful Skype!!! Yay! Not one, but TWO! Hooray! So good. I love technology. Got to see my cute new second cousin and established myself as his favorite. AND got to chat with another cutie. This one had an Italian accent. Swoooooon. The conversation was so totally ridiculous but I loved every second. And I got to meet his dog, Rocky. SO much cuteness for one morning. It was too much, I had to go back to bed and sleep until like, 2 in the afternoon. Then I went to the grocery store and was delirious from hunger and bought the most random shit. Two apples, sushi, a can of refried beans and a slim jim. WHAT? Now it's dinner and I have no viable options. Stupid.

Bud: Another possible Skype date tomorrow. The fridge back to working. Getting paid next week. HALLOWEEEEEENNNN!!!!

Dream big people! (One day I'm figuring out how to say that in Italian)

Beyond Precious

Here's the deal: I kind of don't really want babies. They seem like a huge pain...they're cute for a while but then they grow up and they're not cute again for a long time, possibly ever. There's a long list of other reasons but I also would really just like to avoid being pregnant. I sat through "The Vagina Monologues" and listened to "I Was There in the Room" one too many times to think that pregnancy was a viable option for my lifestyle. Don't google it, you'll vom.

However.

This:

is making me rethink things. Meet Isaac, newest member of the family and currently the cutest baby in all of the UK. Oh, you don't believe me?

Bam! Denied.

And this:

Makes me think I need a baby and a dog! Not good. I can't afford either. Obviously, I am not saying I'll definitely be having babies in the very far distant future. Maybe I'll adopt one instead and skip over that whole pregnancy nonsense. Or, maybe I'll focus on finding a husband first and just not worry about babies or the possibility of babies for a while.

That might be best.

In other news, I have to do a quick plug, for myself. I have gone out/done something that required me going to bed late and/or involving alcohol every night this week and somehow, I'm still standing. I am not all that tired AND I've managed to look decent at work all week. Basically, I'm awesome and wanted to share. Wednesday night I got an authentic Italian dinner and it was SO good. You're jealous. You're also jealous I have the cutest baby ever in my family. So I'll rub it in your face one last time.

Amazeballs

you paid for my bus ride - m4w: "i was sleeping on the bench and you asked if i was going, i said no i'm broke, you said you would pay for me, so i got on the bus. i was going to follow you home but i didn't know if that would be appropriate. So i'm in the pubic library, typing this on craigslist, maybe you can let me move in with you.
i know how to make pancakes."

How fucking amazing is that Craigslist missed connection? Best one I've ever read, by far.

Umm, let me explain how/why I was looking at the Craigslist's missed connections. It's pretty basic, I went there to look for a second job/try to sell the Rock Band and I got distracted. Someone was talking about missed connections the other day and I thought they would be interesting to read. And they were. Some are so hilarious. Some are a little on the pathetic/creepy side, but they are definitely interesting. I wonder if the people ever connect. I feel like I have heard a story about how missed connections did connect one time and now they're married or something. I don't remember where I saw that. Maybe I made it up, I don't know.

Anyway, I think they're really entertaining and that one above is by far the most fantastic one I've ever read. I love that it kind of doesn't make any sense. Why would anyone wake someone up to ask if they were going? And going where? To get on the bus? Home? To the store? Jeez, why would you say you considered following someone home? Yes, that is totally not appropriate...keep it to yourself! Why not say let's meet or something..moving in with someone is kind of a big step. Take it slow! I do love, however, that the selling point is you know how to make pancakes. That is important in a roommate relationship. I'm assuming, however, that the roommate would be expected to buy all the ingredients to make said pancakes since you couldn't afford bus fare. I'm going to need you to bring something else to the table if you expect to be in a completely co-dependent relationship. Like sausage. I love pigs in a blanket. If that post is legit, then it's totally creepy and would be something to add to my list of reasons why I don't give things to crazy homeless people on the street. If it's fake, good job, funny person.

I know I sound like a heartless bitch by not giving people things but seriously, you just never know! It honestly kind of scares me to interact with the crazies out here. My friend gave someone a handful of change and the recipient got all angry and indignant because the change was mainly pennies! I mean, really? I overheard another man telling a woman offering him food he didn't like whatever he was offering her! Whatever happened to "beggars can't be choosers?" Someone obviously didn't get that memo. Today on the street I saw a guy offering someone clearly down on their luck a doughnut, and that warmed my heart a little but in my head I was all, I would never do that! Sorry crazy homeless people. Once, I gave a quarter to someone because I was on the phone and distracted (a quarter was what she asked for, I wasn't being stingy) but then it got weird because she started popping up literally everywhere I went. Sorry, but I need my quarters for laundry.

Jeeeez, enough about me going on about all the different reasons I'm going to hell! Other than my hilarious find, I didn't have any other luck on Craigslist. I think I'm going to give the missed connections a regular look though. I wonder what I would do if I ever popped up on there. I probably won't, as I never smile at people, but you just never know. I would be pretty torn about responding, I'm not going to lie. I probably wouldn't do it in the end though. Somehow, I think we'll never know. ::Fingers secretly crossed::

In other news, I'm pretty sure our fridge is broken :( Of course I just bought a bunch of frozen food at Trader Joes. DAMMMMIIITTTTT.

Whatever. Dream big people!

I throw my hands up in the air sometimes...

...out of frustration. Damn! Been frustrated a lot lately. Plus, I am currently listening to "Dynamite" so I was inspired. Even thought I'm almost positive being frustrated is not at all what the song is about. But whatever, creative license bitches.

Anyway, work has been weird lately. It's gotten a lot better in some ways and other ways, and in other ways it is just going down the shithole. I don't want to get myself in trouble but I am getting beyond frustrated with some of the shenanigans going on. Grrrrrr. I can't really decide how I want to go about the next few months. Do I look for something else? Do I hold out until I get my two weeks vacay? What to do, what to do?? I just don't really know.

In general, I'm just torn about a lot of things. I like LA and I am enjoying myself a lot more these days. The weather is back to sucking, but social life wise things have picked up and I'm feeling good about things. However, I also am starting to feel a little stagnant. Which is slightly redic, I haven't even been here a year, but I get restless. I feel like a year is too long to be one place. I KNOW, totally ridiculous. A year is nothing! But I've got wanderlust like a mofo and I'm ready for something new. Maybe not for another couple of months, but I for sure don't want to stay here forever. I don't think I could afford it even if I wanted to. Shit is expensive out here!

Annnddd the Italian. I adore him so much. However, he is NOT here! More frustration. Wouldn't it be awesome if you could just wish things into being because you wanted them really really really really bad? Would be nice, huh? His friend, however, is still here, and he has been pissing me off lately. Mainly because he told me he thinks American girls are shallow. I think the problem is more about the language barrier and the fact he is meeting sketchy girls, but it still pissed me off that he said it. It wasn't even softened with a "ok, not ALL American girls..." HELLO, you are talking to an AMERICAN girl! (Not the doll). How am I supposed to take that? I think it made me more mad than it should have because I think MY Italian is going to think the same thing. Maybe he does, I don't know, we haven't discussed that. But it makes me upset to think about it. Especially since it's more about cultural differences and language barriers than me being shallow. Because, like, hello! I am like, totally not shallow! Plus, I make myself crazy trying to figure out what he really thinks, what he feels and it's totally stupid. For one, it doesn't matter because HE'S NOT HERE and two, I will never know what he really thinks because he's a boy and they make no sense AND he can't speak enough English to tell me anyways.

Bah, this post is stupid. Sorry. I'm just tired and the rain is bringing me down. For some positiveness, I have a super cute new second cousin. I also have clean sheets, a new web cam and got an awesome Halloween card in the mail. Also, my stupid roommate may be moving out soon! Things are looking better already!

Dream big people! :)

Shehadababyitsaboy

A boy! A boy!

They are rare in our family! No name yet...I'll keep you posted. There are pics...I love the internet! More soon!

PS-Who remembers this commercial???

Update: His name is Isaac Paul and he is happy and healthy! Can't wait till I get to meet him! :)

Baby!

HOLY MOLY! My cousin, Austin, is in labor RIGHT NOW in England! I don't even know what to do with myself! She is going to be someone's MOM here shortly and a baby is coming out of her! Crazy!!!! Obviously, she is not the first pregnant person that ever was, but it still blows my mind. She is my age! More later when I find out the sex, name, etc. Exciting!!!! Not going to lie, I don't wish I was there the room, but I do hope I get to see that little booger soon!!!!

I will get to see he/she via Skype soon since I bought a new computer today! Wooo hooo! Definitely can't afford it, but that is what credit cards are for. And, it was completely neccessary. You really just can't imagine the nonsense I was putting up with. Unacceptable.

Video chat me up sometime!

Dream big people!

Mi Fai Sorridere

Look at me, brushing up on my Italian! Thank you, Google Translate. Even if you make no sense 95% of the time. Someeeooonneeee (guess who) told me I had a beautiful smile today. And I have not stopped smiling since. See: :)

And it really could not have come at a better time because I had a little run in with a crazy lady at work today. She was not supposed to come to class on Friday. And she KNEW that because we even discussed it on Monday. But, she showed up and I said something to her and she got all mad and called me ridiculous. Whatever, I let her go to class and then at the end, on her way out, she says "You can read what I think about you on the Internet." And then something else about me being a strange lady. I smiled, said ok, thank you! Have a nice life.

That last part was a little weird/harsh but my brain was in overdrive because I was pissed/afraid I was going to have to slap a bullet to her face! (not really, I don't have a gun at work, calm down)

I really do not like when I have confrontations with people. It affects me physically and it's really just unpleasant. I had an altercation on the phone yesterday as well and I guess it just gets my adrenaline going because I have to take deep breaths and get myself back to normal. It's a good thing these instances didn't happen on the caffeine pill day because I might have lost my shit for realllzzzz. Why do people have to be so rude and ridiculous? I just don't understand.

On the OTHER hand, I have lots of people that make me happy so screw you if you don't. :) Thank you, Italian, for turning my frown upside down. For some reason he thinks it SO hilarious that we say "you're welcome" after someone says "thank you." In Italian they say "prego" which is the equivilant, but really means "please." Don't ask me why that tickles him so much, but it does and in turn, it cracks me up. It gest mentioned, literally, every time we talk. He also says this: "hihihihihihih" a lot, which I guess is laughing, but sometimes it's this: "ahahahahaha" but I don't know the difference. I don't care, it's hilarious either way.

I also walked to the library on my lunch break and was a huge nerd and checked out two new books. Pretty stoked about them, I'll keep you posted.

Looking forward to the weekend!!! Skype date tomorrow (hopefully!) and then PARTY TIME for a friends birthday! YAY!

Dream big people! :)

Insanity Pills

PEOPLE!

Yesterday I bought multi-vitamins and silly me did not do a proper job of looking over the label. I really only wanted Iron pills, but couldn't find them at CVS, so I figured I'd just go balls to the wall and get an all in one thing PLUS it said it boosts metabolism so I figured that would lead to less fatness and hooray for that. But, I didn't notice the part where it said "product contains about as much caffeine as a cup of coffee." Big mistake. I took one this morning and like, lost my mind. It's now almost time to leave and I can still feel it. Basically, I was a fucking crazy person all day today.

For anyone that doesn't know, I do not do well with caffeine. I rarely drink it and only when I'm really really tired. Especially not coffee because it can, and will, send me over the edge. Luckily today I was in a good mood, so I was out of control happy but sometimes it works the opposite and that is no good. I would pretty much make the worst crack head ever. I would be horribly violent. If I ever did speed, I think my heart would literally explode out of my chest and my veins would explode out of my arms. Today, I could literally feel the caffeine coursing through my arms and racing around in my head. I couldn't really sit still. My computer was going sooo super slow and I almost threw the keyboard across the room. I restrained from doing that, but I did bang it loudly and inappropriately on the desk a few times. I said literally a lot this paragraph. I need you to understand how REAL this all was. My coworkers know and I'm sure they are a little freaked out by me. I freaked myself out.

In other news, I went to the Apple store because my earphones have fallen apart and guess how much new ones are?

Higher.

Lower.

Higher.

Ok, I'll just tell you. $30!!! What?? That is nonsense! I don't even like spending $30 clothes, no way I'm doing it on little tiny earphones that hurt if you have them in to long. Plus, I need new ones because the old ones fell apart! They little rubber stuff on the edges is all coming off. LAME! I feel this is Apple's fault and they should give me replacement ones, free of charge. Lord knows they can afford it, there were like, 5,000 people in the store buying ridiculously overpriced nonsense like mini iPads and grande iTouches. I'm an Apple fan, no lie, but only if I get them as gifts. Sorry but I am not hip or rich enough to purchase things on my own. Other things that fall in this category: leggings from American Apparel. Also $30. SUPER LAME. Just going in American Apparel makes me feel like I'm surrounded by douchiness so I was not pleased at all when I saw the price of SIMPLE BASIC LEGGINGS. I can't even believe I'm buying leggings, but I need them to wear under dresses now that it's getting chillier. I looked in 3 other stores already! Can I just get some damn brown leggings people! All the stores had jeggings (leggings that look like jeans) and those make me vomit in my mouth a little.

Ok, well it's time to leave. I'm hoping this caffeine will wear off by the time I want to go to bed. I'm a little afraid to go to the gym because I think my heart will start racing and just won't stop. We'll see.

Dream big people!

PS-If anyone wants to buy decaf multi-vitamins and trade with me, holla!

Get your old man swag on

Starting to drink at 3:00 in the afternoon, when it's really hot and eating only french fries for dinner is a bad idea. Especially when the french fries are super super hot and they burn the top of your mouth. But they were extremely tasty, so it was worth it.

Anyways, that was my day yesterday. I went to a birthday bar crawl all over LA. We went to thirteen bars. THIRTEEN people! Actually, I only made it to like, 9 since I met up with them at bar 4. I think. It was a long day. I didn't really have high hopes for it because I got off the bus on the wrong stop and was in, quite possibly, the sketchiest place I have ever been in my life. It was so horrible. It smelled awful, it was hot, there were nothing but homeless people out and about and I was looking super hot, so it made me really uncomfortable. Just kidding about that, but I was wearing a dress and I was not really wanting to draw attention to myself.

Turns out, that was the least of my problems. The free shots on an empty stomach thing actually proved to be more problematic later in the evening. It all started when we when we went to bar 11 (maybe 12) and it was actually a bar inside a strip club. I was tricked! And it made me sick. Literally. I won't go into details, but things just kind of went downhill after that.

Ok, lets not talk any more about how I'm a drunken idiot. Don't worry, I got home safe and sound and nothing bad happened. Let's talk instead about how Fantasy Factory is completely hilarious! Soo funny! I found out today that Rob was at the Grilled Cheese Invitational that I was at as well! I can't believe I missed him! That would have made that stupid thing SO much better. Damn. Oh well...I still want to find the factory. I think it is somewhere in downtown LA. I don't know what I would do if I ever found him, but he cracks me up! It would be so fun just to have a conversation with him. Right now him and Drama are driving around town dressed as old men. So. Damn. Funny. They're so realistic looking! Now they're taking old people dance lessons. Love it! I want Drama to be my boyfriend.

Let's also talk about how Jackass in 3D is probably the absolute last thing I would ever want to see in 3D. It's another bad idea. Unless Drama wanted to take me to go see it...then I might consider it.

Ok, well it's really hot and I'm still hungover so I'm stopping now. Hope everyone had a fantastic weekend! Oh yeah, my mom is freaking awesome! Just wanted to get that out there. :)

Dream big people!

Real Real Gone

My new favorite Van song! I really like that Van and I are on a first name basis. We're tight like that. Don't be jealous.

Whoa people, sorry for the crazy yesterday! I should probably just keep things like that to myself, huh? Since no one comments or responds (usually), I guess it doesn't really matter in the end. Like I've said before, this blog is really for me, about me so I kind of don't care about what anyone thinks. I mean, I want you to enjoy it, but I'm going to assume no news is good news so clearly everyone loves it! Hooray!

Ok not doing so well with keeping the crazy in check. I was reading about guilty pleasures in another blog so I thought I would share mine. Again, not that anyone cares, but I am sooo bored at work.

Side story: Foreign kids make me smile so much! This Spanish kid literally, just ran in here because his certificate was wrong. After he caught his breath, he pulled out this huge bottle of water and was like, ah! I so thirsty! And then was so polite and offered some to me. It was strange and wonderful all at the same time.

Ok, guilty pleasures, here we go:

1. Katy Perry's "Teenage Dream." So catchy! I've listened to it like, 5 times today. Pop music in general, actually. Love it! Don't care who knows it.

2. Candy. Might explain the fatness.

3. Fast food! I know, it's processed and horrible but I DON'T CARE. Give me more. Also, with the fatness. Dammit.

4. Facebook. Yes, I waste a lot of time on there. But I got time to waste, so whatever. It's also such a great connection to friends all over the place I don't get to see/talk to on a regular basis. Farmville and other weird games on there? No. Excessive picture stalking? Ok. Chatting? Yes please.

5. Myself. I watch my Ellen video ummm, frequently. It just makes me so happy. I'm pretty vain. But it's part of my charm, no? :)

Another side story: The Fed Ex man just stumbled up here and I'm pretty sure he's drunk.

6. Wikipedia. It can tell no lies in my eyes. The internet in general, I guess. I'll believe whatever it tells me.

7. My ipod touch. Kind of obsessed with it.

8. Twitter. So embarrassed.

9. Sparkly things. I am constantly stopping myself from buying entire outfits made of glitter. Not because I wouldn't wear them (I totally would), but because I can't afford them. Sad.

10. Dance movies. They make me sooooo happy and soooo jealous at the same time. It's a vicious cycle.

I don't know why, but I like my lists to have at least 10 things on them. I'm sure I can think of more, but I'll stop the embarrassment and end with 10.

Back to the grind. Dream big people!

Midnight Train to Georgia

No, I'm not taking one. That would take forever. In fact, I just looked it up and it would take me 74 hours and 12 minutes. I could fly there faster and for about the same amount of money. Plus, I have no real reason to go to Georgia, I was just listening to the song. Which brings me back to my original thought. In the song, Gladys (Knight, we're on a first name basis, you might not be) and the Pips says she would "rather live in his world than live without him in mine." Which got me to thinking. Please keep in mind this is all hypothetical. I am not considering moving anywhere (...in the United States....right now) for a man nor do I even have a man or a man's world to move for. I just heard the song and my thoughts started going. Also, today has been somewhat of an emotional roller coaster and I'm going to get it all out via this blog. Feel free to stop reading if you're not into crazy.

Obviously, with my new "love affair" with the Italian, thoughts of relocation have been going through my head. But, I'm torn. Because on one hand, living in Italy would be so awesome. Y'all know I love Italy and it would be a DREAM to go back and live there. And if I had a boy toy involved as well, ooohhh man. That would be sweet. However, do I really want to be that girl that moved to another country for a guy?! I just don't know about all that. I will try to explain my scatterbrained thoughts...

Ok, so when I hear that song I'm like, this girl is pathetic. But them I'm also like, uggh, is my world that great that I need to stay in it all sad and lonely? Because my world is ok...I mean, I like it but it's not like, blowing my mind or rocking my face off. And I can't lie, I do get really really sad and lonely sometimes. Mainly, I just want to go on some damn dates! And I want some kisses! Is that so much to ask? Italian kisses sent via facebook are not just not the same as real ones. I feel like I have gotten the short end of the stick when it comes to boys and relationships (no. really. I win) and its starting to piss me off. I know I'm not the only person that feels like this, but dammit, I deserve some boy goodness for once! I want the long end of the stick! Or whatever. Why is it that the only people interested in me are nowhere close by and the one actually likes me back (for once! this is rare!) is in another damn country. ANOTHER COUNTRY. Really fucking far away.

Right. Sorry, you guys are not stupid. You know Italy is far away.

Anyways, here's my thing. I really like this kid. He is sooo cute. But what am I thinking? If he were here, great, we could just hang out and have a fling, hooray! But he's not here and he's not going to be here or anywhere close to here any time soon. Do I continue chatting it up with him and see if it goes anywhere? Do I keep looking for someone here? Do I get crazy and move back to Italy? It's totally a possibility y'all. I could go back next summer, do the same camp I did last year and then hang around and teach English or give tours or something. But, really? Really? Does that make any sense? Furthermore, would he even want me to do that? He seems pretty set on moving to the United States. Is it weird that I am more willing to move to Italy than for him to come here and us settle down? And furthermore, I don't even really know this guy. I know a good deal, but it's hard to really know someone when they are not speaking your language. Literally.

OR, I could just shut the fuck up because the whole thing is totally ridiculous. Right? Man, I wish someone would just tell me what I'm supposed to do. Anyone? Anyone feel like telling me whats up? I am obviously a total lunatic. I think the main problem is that I want this to work out really really bad and I'm willing to convince myself that the crazy is attainable. Crazier things have happened. Remember when I got picked to be on Ellen?!? Remember??? How much crazy goodness does one person get? Did I use mine all up?

Seriously though. How awesome of a story would this be if it actually worked out? So fucking awesome.

More problem: I'm bored. I literally need something to do every second of every day and when I don't have that, I start thinking wacky thoughts and I let myself get upset about really silly nonsense.

So. Deep breath. Time to eat some ice cream and get some sleep. I have been crazy tired all this week, I don't know what the problem is. What I should probably do is just take it one day at a time, go with the flow, see what happens and every other saying you can think of for just chilling the fuck out. In the wise words of my sisters profile (and Marilyn Monroe, apparently): "sometimes things fall apart so better things can fall together." So here's to hoping for better things.

And still, a new computer. Mine is being RIDICULOUS.

Dream big, people!

Magic Time

VAN! I SAW VAN!

He was so great. So so great. I laughed, I sang, I danced (a little) and I sat in a puddle. It was magical. We did miss the first few songs, I heard "Brown Eyed Girl" in the parking lot, but I'm not going to dwell on it because it will make me furious, should I think about it too much. So I won't.

Instead, I'll just say it was a really good concert. Learned some new music, heard some faves...it was lovely.

And today, it's raining. And it's weird because I don't have something to run off and do. I have still been talking to the Italian and he is still just making me smile so much. I'm concerned, however, that is he likes the idea of getting to live in the US more than he actually likes me. This could be getting lost in translation (as much of our conversations do), but he really wants to live here. With five kids. Could be problematic. But, since he is still REALLY far away, I guess it doesn't really matter. He can just continue chatting it up on fb and making me laugh.

That's it for now I guess.

Dream big people! I'm personally dreaming of a new computer and ITALIA. You?

Lust Nuggets

Lust Nuggets: This is written on the back door of the bathroom at work. I don't know who wrote it, or what the hell it means, but it makes me laugh every time I see it. Which is a lot, because I have to go to the bathroom ALL the time.

Anyway! It's been quite the exciting last couple of days! Saturday I played in a softball tournament and it was really fun. It was in honor of a woman that died last year (I never met her), and she loved softball and all the money raised went to a charity in Hollywood she worked with. I thought the whole thing was pretty cool and think she must have been a pretty awesome lady. There were a lot of people there and they raised over $30,000! So go her! My team was Arrested Development and we were 2-3. It was a very fun, looong, weird weather day. It was in North Hollywood and when I got there (at 7:30 in the morning), it was pretty chilly. Then it was cloudy, then it started raining, that cleared up and it was crazy hot for a couple hours and when the sun went down, it was pretty much perfect. Then I went back to my neck of the woods and it was like, 15 degrees cooler. LA, you so crazy! Overall, I did pretty terrible, playing wise. It's been a while since I played softball and my glove is major struggling. I've had it since 4th grade and yes it's awesome because it's signed by Charlie the Riverdog, but it has zero shape or grip left. I had a couple good hits but then the heat got to me and I started swinging at whatever came my way. Oh well, still a fantastic time.

Sunday, I had a Skype mishap with the Italian and it was very sad...we did not get to talk.
:( Stupid time difference! Also, stupid computer! Ughhh, my computer is so terrible! It has decided it will not connect to the internet and it doesn't have a camera so I can't use it for Skype anyways. :( :( :( :( Still working on a plan to remedy that. He still entertains me on facebook, so it's all good. Yesterday he said I had nice "teef." Ok, yes, it's hilarious but it made me cringe a little too. But I still "love" him. I say "love" because he takes everything I say very literally and very seriously. This doesn't always work in my favor as I am very sarcastic and sarcasm doesn't really translate well. This also makes me look like a crazy person as he thinks I am in love with him. Rushing things just a tad. He also told me we wants to have five kids...which puts our future in jeopardy because that is about five more than I want to have. But, since he's still in Italy and I'm still here, kids are not really a possibility either way.

Last night, I went to Dancing with the Stars! It was pretty fun, and loooong. We were there for 3 hours! I have never watched the show, so it was interesting, but it's not something I think I'll get into. There were lots of "famous" people there and we were sitting (on the front row!), two seats down from Brandy's mom..and Ray J! They were both rude and left after she performed. It was fun to watch, but I kind of got a little filled with rage when Bristol Palin danced. Like, I seriously want to punch her in the face. She is such a whiny bitch and she is STILL preaching abstinence! For real?!! I mean, whatever, but at least stop whining about how hard your life is as a single mom. You are on a TV SHOW. Where was your kid last night idiot?!

Deep breath.

Other than her, the dances were mainly fun. The Situation, bless his heart, was beyond horrible and had an awful outfit on. He looked like he was trying really hard, so props for that. My vote, if I voted, would have gone to Margret Cho...even though she was last according to the "judges." Other people of note: Florence Henderson for dancing to Edelweiss (love that song! love Sound of Music!), the guy that played Peter Pettigrew (Harry Potter) in the audience, and this absolutely crazy looking tranny lady that was going on in the bathroom about how she just could not understand why this guy was staring at her! I think it might have been because her fake boobs were, literally, bursting out of her dress. It looked painful.

And tonight, VANNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO EXCITED!

More later, I should probably work now. Life is good!

Dream big people! :)

Bring on the Rain

Yesterday was the best fucking day ever! I would have shared this with you all last night, only my POS computer was out of order for the evening, my apologies.

Maybe I was high from the caffeine Midol I took, but I was feeling super great. I was a little sad in the morning because the ENTIRE school got to go to the beach together and I had to sit in the office all alone. But then I realized being all alone was a good thing because it was soo lovely and quiet. Don't get me wrong, I love all the students (especially those Spanish!) and the teachers (most of them), but the silence was so nice and peaceful!

Also, I spoke with the Italian again and he just brings me endless joy with his ridiculous and nonsensical English. I'm pretty awesome at deciphering nonsensical English (it's kind of my thing) so I get most of what he's saying. He is hilarious in everything that he says, even when it's not on purpose. Actually it's even funnier when it's not on purpose. And he's always so happy! I get a million smiley faces and lots of hahahahahaha! I guess he thinks I'm hilarious too! He told me yesterday he had to go take a shower because he was going to exit tonight. To a pub. Full of people. LOVE IT. Fucking love it. So funny!

Then, after school, I decided to have my own beach day so I walked down there and the weather was PERFECT. I sat, I watched the sunset, I saw dolphins jumping, read a little, had a great phone convo, watched the scary huge seagulls wander around, it was magical.




Just when I thought things couldn't possibly get any better, I am walking to the bus and what do I see? A RAINBOW!!! It was delightful! I get on the bus, I get to ride for free (long, separate story) and then it starts raining! Normally this would not be a good thing, but I was just thinking to myself last week, man, I kinda miss rain. And then it goes and pops up (down) for me! Special! It made my walk home quite lovely. It also cooled my room down to about 95 degrees instead of 200, so that was nice as well. Then I ate my biscuits and edamame for dinner and watched Ellen and life was good.


Overall, just a freaking fantastic day. Today is off to a pretty good start as well so hopefully the rest of the day has good things to offer. :)

Dream big people!