Not Stupid

I love when I'm reminded I have awesome friends, people can be cool and my life is pretty great (and you ain't nothin but a ho). It's also so refreshing to have good conversation and be reminded I am not a total crazy person/bitchface.

Obviously, I know I can have bouts of crazy and bitchface, but I am not alone in this. As I said, a little facebook spat got me all worked up Monday and it just made for some unpleasant feelings. Weirdly, and possibly surprising to some, I sometimes decide NOT talking about things is the best course of action. I only really think this because I feel like I bother people with my problems and if there's anything I DON'T want to be in life, it's bothersome. I know I don't like annoying people and I certainly don't want to annoy others. Point is, I was kind of like, maybe this doesn't need to be discussed. But, someone asked me about it and it got discussed and it was really nice to get it out and then be done with it. So thanks person! :) Sometimes other people are just mean and need to be ignored.

Yesterday I attempted to go to a taping of Chelsea Lately...it was too "late" for me to get in, but I get to go back with priority seating next week. Works for me! Good things happen when I have guaranteed tickets. I also got to hang out with a friend I don't see very often and it was just lovely. Good conversation was had and I was reminded I am not the only person that deals with stupid shit at work and is sometimes really bitchy. Again, I always knew this but people need to be reminded sometimes.

Also got some good texts, fb messages, and phone calls. Oh, and a lovely Easter card! Yay friends! And, tomorrow I am going to Six Flags! For freeeeee! Love rollercoasters, can't wait!

Have I shared this: http://fuckyouverymuch.dk/. I enjoy this website.

Dream big people!

Stupid

Another reason I hate Hollywood and it's nonsense (it's a love/hate relationship). For the "Extra" commercial today, it says: The Royal Wedding! Meet Kate's pole dancing cousin and her party going sister.

FAIL, Extra! Why do you have to do shit like that? It's pathetic really. I mean, I am pretty indifferent about the Royal Wedding. Ok, well I'm more on the pro side, I guess...I'm all for it and I'm happy for the two of them. I think it's always fantastic when people get married. Yay! You guys love each other! Pretty dress! Champagne! Dancing! Yay! Yay! Seriously, there is no sarcasm there at all. I LOOOOVVEEE weddings. I think they are so fun and I love going to them. And this one is going to be huge! COOL!

Just wanted you to know I was being honest. Moving on. I'm happy for them, and will be looking at pictures online the day after, but I will not be staying up late to watch the whole thing go down. Yay, Kate and Will, but I wasn't invited and I like sleeping.

However, I think it's really shitty that Extra has to take this lovely little wedding and find the bad and just exploit the hell out of it. I know, I KNOW that from now on everything Kate does is going to be dissected and judged and her family is going to be dragged through the mud, but I just REALLY don't think it's necessary. Why does Hollywood have to be SO DAMN NEGATIVE all the time? I just don't get it. Jesus, that poor cousin. She's just trying to make that paper, people! Or maybe she just took a class one time and now people sensationalizing it. And the sister! She's the smart one! Partying is way more fun than getting married. Married is boring. On top of that, her sister is about to become a PRINCESS. You know she's jealous. Just leave her alone! I know I'd be kind of mad if my sister got to be a princess and I had to be her lady in waiting or whatever.

Also, did anyone watch "Talking Funny" on HBO? It was not as hilarious as I thought it was going to be. I also don't understand why the differences between British and American humor (humour) wasn't addressed. Ricky Gervais had this argument with the rest of them (Louis CK, Chris Rock, Jerry Seinfeld) about the irony of something and whether or not it's funny and blah blah blah. And no one said anything about Ricky being different because he's British. Maybe I'm the only one that thinks that matters. Does that make me ...culturlist? I know at least Reader's Digest agrees with me. I read an article in there once about how comedy doesn't always translate well and I think that is really true. From traveling and now working with people from all over the world, there are definitely differences between what different cultures think is funny. Even if you are speaking the same language.

Ok, well this is getting way off base. Another post, perhaps? Last thing-I think they should have had a woman comic in the mix. Would have made for a more interesting dynamic. For me. And I'm all that matters. Real quick, my favorite part of the special:

Chris Rock: I can talk about how much "Livin la Vida Loca" sucks, but blah blah blah
Jerry Seinfeld: (kind of in the background): I like that song.

Made me laugh the hardest out of everything. I love the subtleties of comedy/often I'm the only one laughing.

Last but not least, two things:

1. I have been trying REALLY hard to be positive this week. But dammit if the universe is not trying to bring me down! Had some unexpected and definitely unintentional fb controversy today and it really made me upset. The other person got really nasty and I got unnaturally upset about the whole thing. That, and a picture of my Italian boy and his new [ugly] girlfriend :( I seriously am going to just pretend neither incident happened so moving right along.

2. For some good news, I lost 11.5 pounds! I know I should be happier, but I still have a long ass way to go. Sigh.

Dream big people!

Something Cool

It may only be cool to me, but I'm sharing anyway. I am not a huge country fan these days (I was back in the day...first concert: Alan Jackson and Pam Tillis), but I have recently been getting into Darius Rucker. I have been a fan since his Hootie and the Blowfish days....surprise! His real name is not Hootie. Th my second big concert (5th grade) and I remember it really well. They filmed part of a music video from the concert (don't remember what song) and I went with my friend Kayla and her brother and his friend who made fun of us the whole time. Anyway, Darius recently broke into the country world on his own and I just recently have been listening. And I like it! I am also just so proud he is from Charleston and films a lot of his videos locally. It's not that I've been getting homesick lately, but I have become fiercly proud of Charleston since I moved to LA. I think I'm just realizing what a unique and awesome place it was to grow up and am really proud I'm able to say I'm from there. And that I'm eventually going back, haha.

Anyway, I also think it's really cool Darius has filmed videos in both my homes, on both coasts:

West Coast version (in Venice Beach):




East Coast version (Downtown Charleston and Mt. Pleasant):




Nifty, huh?

And, my dad told me he filmed another video on Sullivan's Island recently, "Together Anything is Possible" and I've been looking for it online because I really want to see it! I don't think it's been released yet, but all the proceeds from the song are going towards PGA charities and I watched something about that last night and a little tiny bit of the SI video was in it. He was singing in the gazebo in the park on Sullivan's Island! I was so proud, I started crying a little bit. I just love that place so much and it holds a lot of good memories. I've also always kind of secretly wished that is where I'll get married. I am not really the type of girl to plan out wedding details for my non-existent, possibly not ever happening, wedding, but that is one thing I've thought about. That, and the fireworks I'll be having afterwards. Ok, there are a few other things as well but let's not get into all that.

Anywho. Kind of a low key weekend. My goal was to not spend money, but that was all thrown to hell with a trip to Wal-Mart!!!! But it's ok but Wally World is so fantastic, it was worth the money. Also, a trip there is rare these days, so again, totally justified. Everything I bought was completely necessary. Including "Rockstar Pink" nail polish. From drab to ROCKSTAR for just $2.50. Love it. The clothing section at this one was pretty sad, but it was probably for the best. I was just happy to be there. And that it was open. Pretty much everything else was closed for Easter. Which, is a total non-event with no family and only Jewish and Atheist friends around. Kind of sad, but probably for the best since Easter candy is not on my diet.

Ok. Looking forward to this week going by fast and MIAMI next week! I'm trying a new thing at work this week. It's called: Try really hard not to be so grouchy. Suggestions and/or funny/encouraging emails/texts/messages/videos welcome. Thanks in advance.

Dream big people! Rockstar pink style!

Boo

http://jezebel.com/#!5793550/capture-the-flag-puts-our-children-in-danger

This article makes me so depressed. It basically says that all outside games involving any type of contact and/or fun have been deemed "unsafe" by the health department. I'm sorry, but that is just truly sad and horribly lame. There is some other stuff about what the point of all that is for, but I honestly feel sorry for kids these days. I know I sound ridiculously old saying that, but come on! You can't do anything these days without it being politically incorrect. And I am all for facebook and the internet and video games, but there needs to be a healthy balance.

Actually, I really don't know that much about how kids are now...I was actually thinking about that last night. I have some "kid" age cousins, but I don't really see them very often or keep up with their daily lives and I don't think I even know anyone under 18 here in LA. Kind of strange since I had some sort of kid interaction up until I moved here. Kids can be super duper annoying, but they can also be hilarious and fun, and waaaaayyy less difficult to deal with than whiny ass, rich non-English speaking adults.

Anyway, back to my point. I grew up going to camp and I truly believe it is the greatest thing in the world. I LOVED going off to Camp Cherokee every summer and always had the best time singing songs, playing ridiculous games, sleeping in a cabin, and doing loads of other completely nonsensical activities. I loved it so much I was a counselor there for 3 years and then moved on to another camp, Camp Greenville. I seriously cannot say enough good things about my experiences at both of these places and therefore think the YMCA is the greatest institution the US has to offer. I am not even kidding, people. Here's how much I love it:

"From a thousand Y camps round the world, you can hear our happy cry (hey hey)
We work and play the whole day through, as we grow proud and strong
Growing body, mind and spirit too, building friendships day by day,
We are mighty proud to be a part of the GREAT Y-M-C-A!"

I still remember that song and I haven't sang it in probably, 10 years.

Even the time from when I was a camper to when I was a counselor was SO different. So many new rules and things you weren't allowed to do anymore. It's really just sad. They were things that were maybe not the greatest ideas in the world, but they never hurt anyone! Now, everything has to be about liability and one person getting hurt or offended ruins it everyone. Basically, no one wants to take responsibility for their kids (or themselves) being morons and when something goes wrong, they blame it on others. So then everyone else has to cover their asses, which means you aren't allowed to do anything fun anymore. Like play tag. I am still on the fence about having kids but I'm more on the no side because of crap like this.

Moving on. You know what else I think is sad? President Obama is in LA today and the news here is being really negative and whiny about it. I'm not even a huge Obama fan but I think it's pretty lame that the news can only focus on how many traffic delays he is going to cause. He's the fucking PRESIDENT of the United States. I feel like people used to be excited about this sort of thing and now they have people on the news saying, why isn't he taking a helicopter?! But of course, if he took a helicopter, people would be all, Why is he wasting our tax dollars on helicopters?! Also, news flash: the traffic sucks ALL THE TIME in LA. The President is delaying things by like, 10 minutes than what it would normally be. One more thing: You KNEW he was coming! Take an alternate route! Stay at home! Use it as your excuse for leaving early! Shut the fuck up! And him being a Democrat doesn't make him delay traffic more. Republican presidents delay traffic when they come into town too.

I don't know, the news today just really pissed me off. So damn negative. No need to put such a negative, rude spin on everything. He is still the President and I personally think it's still pretty damn cool he will be cruising past my neighborhood sometime tonight. And damn people, be glad you have a car to get stuck in traffic with.

Deep breath.

In other news: ZUMBA IS SUPER DUPER FUN. Also, I just booked a flight to Miami. SO PUMPED! For Cinco de Mayo! Also, my one year Ellen anniversary! Also, my four year college graduation anniversary! YAY YAY YAY!

Going through a my writing sucks phase. Sorry friends. More when I can do better.

Dream big people!

Shake Your Rump

Currently watching 40 Greatest One Hit Wonders of the 90s and it is soooo fantastic. It is bringing back so many good memories and gave an otherwise tumultuous weekend a good ending. I love being reminded of super hilarious and awesome songs like, "My Baby Daddy" by B Rock and the Biz. OOoooh, GOD, this SONG! It is seriously so amazing. BUT T-BIRD, I LUH YOU!



I just love it so much. If you are from America and you don't know and LOVE this song, we are no longer friends. For real.

I'm going to stop talking (yeah right) about the rest of the videos because I seriously have a memory associated with all these songs. And there are 40 of them. So I'll spare you all 40 memories. Ahhh! Walking in Memphis! Such a good song!

Ok. Really. Stopping.

The weekend. So ridiculous. A roller coaster of emotions. Went to Hollywood Friday night and while it looked promising, it kind of turned out to be a bust. There was a classic rock cover band (y'all know how much I love cover bands) and they opened with Bohemian Rhapsody so that was pretty badass. Turns out, the people I was with were not there to see them, we were there for the one man rap show downstairs. I'm all for being supportive, but that's not really my thing. Then, after a series of unfortunate events, we left. Then I went back out with different people and a different cover band and the night ended well. Yay!

Ok, real quick, back to the one hit wonders, let me just say that the people that are total brats about their one hit, are COMPLETELY LAME. I love the people that totally own up to and are like, yeah, I had a fucking one hit wonder and that's fucking awesome. The others that are like, uhhh, no, I don't perform it and I'm sooo over it. Get a life people. Celebrate the cheesiness and the fact that your stupid ass song made you rich and famous and that is a lot more than a lot of people can say. Stop whining. Marky Mark, I'm talking to you. Good Vibrations is the shit.

Ok, anyway. Saturday: ALL day at the beach. HEAVEN. I "borrowed" a bike from the school and rode my ass down to Venice. I had not ridden a bike in a long ass time and it kind of hurt. Also, the bike wouldn't get out of first gear so I was pedaling furiously but not really getting anywhere. It was kind of stressful. I was very happy to get off, lay on the beach and get a wicked back sunburn. After that I took my lobster self to a friends basketball game and was feeling good. Unfortunately, I took a dip down and Saturday night was a disappointment.

Real quick, back to the countdown: jeez, this guy with the bucket hat. The New Radicals, such a goober. It is one of my new goals in life to be one of the commentators on these Vh1 countdown shows. I'm awesome at talking about stuff and would LOVE nothing more than to give my opinions on the 80s, one hit wonders, or whatever else they decide to countdown. Holla, Vh1!

And then Sunday was back up to goodness. Talked with a friend on Skype (finally, yay!), then had an extremely hardcore Sunday Funday. So fun. So drunk and so much ridiculousness. Bar hopped, had an intense heart to heart and saw the most hilarious karaoke ever. That's what you get at a dive bar on a Sunday night in LA. I encourage you to experience it sometime. But do it when you're already drunk. Otherwise, it will be super uncomfortable.

HAHAHAHA: "Everybody loved Vanilla Ice. That guy committed to the running man harder than any other artist in the 90s."

Ok, well this has gone on long enough. I'll stop now. Last thing: the diet has gone way off the rails. So please remind me to chew some gum and not eat french fries. Or at least 90% of the time. Also, food commercials, GET OUT OF MY FACE.

AHHHHH, CHUMBAWUMBA!!!!! Tub thumping! AHH! I get knocked down! My family remixed to: I burp out loud! And then I burp again! Such a classy family I have. :) Oh, shit! And the Macarena! "A pox on all wedding receptions." AMEN! I REFUSE to do the Macarena, it doesn't matter how drunk I am. I will not do it. I have principals! BUT, I do remember doing it for the first time EVER at my 5th grade graduation. I even remember what I was wearing. Ohh, memories.

Dream big people!

OF COURSE! The number one song is "I Like Big Butts." I can't even do this, bitch, I can't EVEN DO THIS. Such an awesome song. Hard to believe Sir Mix a Lot had nothing else to offer the world. Love it. Even white boys got to shout.

Medicore

Yet another installment of, "is jacky crazy?" I still have never gotten any answer, so really, it could go either way. I guess it just depends on who you're talking to.

Today, I was browsing the internet, as I do when I complete all my tasks at work. (PS-if anyone has more internet browsing sites, pass them on. Mine are only good for an hour or so and I've got more time than that to kill) I came across an article about how all gyms are a lie and are scamming you, blah blah. I read some of it because I thought it would be more along the lines of, make the most out of your gym and not what it ended up being. Quick summary: working out at the gym is not as effective as hardcore free weights. Or something like that. Honestly, I lost interest. It was in Men's Journal, so I realize it wasn't really for me to be interested with in the first place, but some of it got me thinking.

Basically, this guy was saying he thought he was in shape but turns out, he wasn't because he went to this super hardcore work out session and was proved to be "as week as a little girl." Ok, why not as weak as a little boy..or just child, I don't know. Of course it's the girl that's weak, but whatever. He continued on, talking about how he could barely even do a simple back squat or something and OH, THE SHAME! He continued on some more about not being able to do things professional athletes are able to do. Here is my question: Am I crazy for wondering, if you are, in fact, NOT a professional athlete, is doing a back squat REALLY that important? Apparently, to him, it was. My problem is that he was SOOO dramatic about how this discovery like, ruined his entire existence and it's now his personal mission to expose the corrupt world of gyms. ( I agree to extent gyms are lame, but that's another post)

Anyway, next to that article, was an advertisement that said: Can YOUR dog surf? Like, wtf? No, my dog cannot surf. I don't even have a dog, but even if I did, I would not invest a lot of time into teaching it how to do things other than not pee on my carpet, not chew up my shit, and not slobber all over people. Those would be my dog objectives.

Here is my point: the internet and the media make me feel like I am just not good enough. Am I crazy for thinking I am mediocre and being ok. I think I am doing JUST FINE in life without being able to do a back squat or have a dog that surfs. Everything in the media is such bullshit and just when I'm thinking I'm doing ok, some news article likes to tell me differently.

Media world: YOU CAN'T WIN.

Real world: ARE YOU ALIVE? OK GOOD.

Seriously. I get up, I go to work, I laugh, I drink, I dance, I'm (usually) nice to people, I help out when I can. I am not trying to be bitter, I'm just saying. I think it's ok for people to live your life the best way you can, even if it's kind of mediocre. I am all for being extraordinary, but I don't like feeling inferior because my (nonexistent) dog can't surf, my (unborn) child can't play piano, and my (pretend) boyfriend isn't a superstar athlete...or can even do a back squat. I think you have to make the most of the opportunities you're presented with and figure out a way to use what you have.

Thankfully, I don't feel this pressure from actual, real people in my life, I just spend too much time on the internet. My own fault, I know. But trust me, I would much rather be doing work than browsing. I am just that good at my job and get done with everything quickly.

Another thing, am I crazy for being the only person who wasn't bullied as a child? That is the other thing I've been seeing a lot of lately. People overcoming their childhood tragedies of bullying and dealing with all the pain and suffering they had to go through. I feel awful for them and know kids can be mean as hell (camp counselor for 6 years, I know what's up), but I had a pretty decent childhood and actually had a lot of fun in high school. I wasn't really a dork, but I certainly was not popular and definitely was not one of the beautiful people. I did all kinds of goober things and somehow made it out unscathed. I don't know...maybe I blocked it all out. Or maybe I was cool and no one ever told me. Who knows.

Other, small am I crazy questions. Am I crazy for being annoyed when I'm trying to enjoy my lunch outside and people are asking me stupid questions like, "You like wearing perfume, right?" Ok, whatever, people are trying to sell crap but I'm sitting there, not near a store, wearing sunglasses AND headphones. I look like I'm not into talking to people, right? Also, if I say no, I don't like wearing perfume (I wear body splash..totally different), then don't follow up with, why not? Seriously. Just go away.

Am I crazy for getting REALLY annoyed when people don't respond to my texts/messages? I mean, if I ask a question, just answer me. Not that hard.

Last but not least: Am I crazy for loving THE HELL out of Slim Jims? They're basically sticks of meaty cholesterol, right? I really wish I could incorporate them into my diet. That would make me very happy.

Dream big people!

Hilarious

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Pap Smears at Walgreens
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor & Satire Blog Video Archive

So proud Stephen Colbert is from Charleston.

Whirlwind

Whoa. Friends. The past few days have been insanity. But GOOD insanity. I have been busy busy busy and I love love love it. Of course, now it's Monday morning and I just want to sleep and NOT go to work, but that is not really an option.

Instead, I'll tell you about the past couple of days...just the highlights, really. And things I find interesting.

Wednesday night: Trivia night! Trivia, like pretty much everything else here, is different than at home. First off, there were 26 teams...that's a lot! We came in 13th, so we were right in the middle. Not too shabby for 2ish people. Ish because we had a third and fourth, but neither stayed the whole time or really contributed anything to Team Shoes and Socks. There were 12 questions about movies, which I obviously sucked at and 12 about 80s power ballads. Surprisingly, I sucked at that as well. 80s pop music would have been a different story. Either way, it was fun, but it was the start of my diet de-railing. A Havarti grilled cheese sandwich was on the menu, and obviously, I had to try it.

More diet sadness Thursday. A student was appalled to find out I had never eaten a Big Mac and insisted on bringing me one for lunch. I am not one to turn down free lunch, so of course, I ate it. It was tasty, but I think I need to stay away from them since it has waaay more calories than I am supposed to be having in one meal. Proud of myself, though, for not eating fries. That night my friend was in a fashion show in Hollywood and it was pretty much the most ridiculous thing I have ever witnessed. There was also pizza involved and that was not good.

First off, the fashion world in general, seems like a total waste of space. That is for an entirely separate post, but for real. It's ridiculous. Furthermore, it was in Hollywood so there was just all kinds of crazy looking people there. My favorite, though, was the 78 year old woman sitting next to me, dancing and telling me about her 11 grandchildren. Also, her daughters were there and they were fighting a losing battle for aging gracefully. Please, someone, when I'm a 40-50 woman and I show up to a club, on a Thursday, wearing a corset and a mini skirt, take my hand, insist that I go home and sign me up for 'What Not to Wear' asap.

Friday, to a club downtown where MACY GRAY was the dj. So random. Apparently there were members of Black Eyed Peas there as well, but I must have missed that. I spent a large chunk of time being an idiot in the back, so I don't know what was going on up front. It was still fun though. I left the club with two German friends and we got ourselves lost. I don't remember telling anyone I knew the way home so I am not claiming responsibility, but we were not anywhere close to where we were supposed to be. We pulled into a Denny's to get some food and ended up being stuck there for THREE hours because the car wouldn't start. That was super lame. I was really tired, there were weird people and I was forced to eat french fries. Ok, not forced, but they were there and I was stressed. Someone finally jumped the car and we made it home. At 5:00 in the morning. Good times all around.

Saturday, after an extensive nap, I decided to go out, yet again. I have been trying to get together with a friend forever, and Saturday we finally could so I didn't want to miss it just because I had gone to bed at 5 that morning. Minor details, people. We went to a bar close to my house and drunken foolishness ensued for a very long time after that...another very late bedtime. A super fun evening, followed by a completely random day. New friends are the best. And can be kind of strange. Loved it. Trying really hard to get back on the diet wagon this week. It's tough once you fall off in such a major way.

Anyway, now I'm tired and trying to talk myself into going to Zumba after work. But, it's cold and I don't want to walk there. We'll see what happens.

Dream big people!

Stunned

I am just one person. I don't know what or why other people do or go to Planned Parenthood. This is just my personal outrage at what is going on. I don't know everything and perhaps am even misinformed. But, I am truly stunned by this debate over funding for Planned Parenthood. Not because it's happening or because there is even a debate, but because of some of the INSANE things that are coming out of people's mouths.

[FYI: don't read if you don't want to get up close and personal with me]

Let me say this: I went to Planned Parenthood yesterday. I did not get an abortion and I received excellent care. My job does not provide me with health benefits (I've been promised them for a few months now, but still have not gotten anything), so this is the one and only doctor's office I've seen in the past year. I'm educated, I have a job, I'm a responsible, hard working, and productive member of society. I did not go to Planned Parenthood because I had unprotected sex, or any kind of sex for that matter. Not that it's any one's business, but I went because I care about my health and wanted to get everything checked up on. I had an abnormal check up not too long ago and needed a follow up. Since I can't afford to check up on any other health issues I have, I figured I would do want I can to at least keep my girl parts healthy. The staff there was extremely nice and made me feel very comfortable and cared for, which has not always been the case at doctor's visits. Even ones I had to pay for. I'm telling you this because in case you were not aware, Planned Parenthood is not an abortion factory. It's a place for people, like me, to receive health care they would not otherwise be able to afford. I'm furious about some of the arguments that people are saying in their budget slashing defense.

One of the biggest arguments from anti-PP people are that they don't want tax dollars paying for baby murders, otherwise known as abortions. Ok, I get it, you don't want your hard earned money going towards things you don't believe in. I'm not an expert, by any stretch of any one's imagination, but after doing some research, I came across this interesting fact:

"Federal money to Planned Parenthood and other family planning clinics goes to providing contraceptive services, sex ed, STI and HIV testing, and cervical cancer screenings. The Hyde Amendment prohibits federal funding to abortions."

So. That whole argument about taxes going towards "murders" seems a little less validated.

Another argument:

"Everybody goes to clinics, to hospitals, to doctors, and so on. Some people go to Planned Parenthood. But you don't have to go Planned Parenthood to get your cholesterol or your blood pressure checked. If you want an abortion, you go to Planned Parenthood. And that's well over 90 percent of what Planned Parenthood does."

First off, everybody does not go to clinics, to hospitals, to doctors and so on. Not everybody can afford it. And secondly, statistics show that only about 3% of the total services provided by PP are abortions. So good try.

Most Infuriating Award:

"But nobody's life is affected by Planned Parenthood. These are options."

MY life is affected by Planned Parenthood. Millions of people are affected and kept healthy by Planned Parenthood. It is my ONLY option for health care and it is the ONLY option I have to get any kind of affordable medical care. It is my ONLY affordable birth control option. And if you must know, my birth control is more about keeping me regular and much, much less about controlling any possible births. Sad, but true.

Above all else, I am always enraged at the arguments MEN feel they are entitled to make about WOMEN'S health care issues. I really just can't believe that man think they are allowed to decide what women should and shouldn't be allowed to do with their bodies. I just wonder if these men would change their tune if it was their daughter or wife's reproductive health was in jeopardy and Planned Parenthood was their only option.

I'll stop. I could go on forever, but I just wanted to get it out because it was truly infuriating reading about it today online. I also just wanted it to be known that I STAND WITH PLANNED PARENTHOOD. I am grateful they exist. And I really hope people will get over their stupid fucking selves and realize how important it is to so many people.

Dream big people. Stand up for something big, too.

Also, this article says it a hundred million times better than me:

http://jezebel.com/#!5790148/potential-budget-shutdown-is-about-abortionexcept-its-not

Hasta Luego

Why I remember this randomness, I don't know. Why I'm sharing this with you, I really don't know. But when I was young, my mom had a video of some guy performing children's songs. It was for really young kids (3-8 probably), but I watched it all the time when I was older (11ish) since I had younger siblings. Also, I won't lie, I liked it. I watched Nickelodeon until I was like, 16 so whatever.

Anyway, this video had a song at the end that went something like this,

"When you don't want to say goodbye, you can say hasta luego. So long, see see you later. I want to see you very soon again, my friend. Si si, maybe tomorrow. You are my special amigo. That's cause you mean so much to me."

I'm very upset I can't find video for this gem, but it's a catchy little jam. I wish I could sing it out loud for you, so it would get stuck in your head too. Holy crap, I am such a loser right now, but I really don't care.

I don't EVER want to say goodbye. I really really hate saying goodbye to people. Not like, bye! See you tomorrow. More like, bye, I really have no idea if I'll ever see you again. And it really sucks because I have to say goodbye like that to people every week. Students leave school every week and it just makes me really upset. There are levels to the upset, but it makes me feel strange every Thursday and Friday. Every time I do, this silly song pops in my head and I really wish I had the video to sing me through the pain.

Sometimes, they are students that I wasn't close with or didn't particularly care for, but saying goodbye to them still makes me feel weird. It's worse when they are ones that I enjoyed seeing everyday, because I really am sad to see them go. But the worst is when I was friends with them (Hi Mario! Hi Birthe!), and I get VERY sad. Especially when they declare me "Jackie-best secratary in all the world." I hate being called the secretary, but if I have to be one, I guess it's ok that I'm the best in the world. It sucks too, because they leave in the middle of the day, so I have to keep working and don't really have the time or the privacy to be sad about it.

I've always hated goodbyes. I would cry and cry at the end of camp, the last day of the semester, coming home from trips, even at season finales of shows sometimes. Even if I didn't watch the show! If it was the last one, I would get upset. Obviously, it's worse when it's real life because it's happening to me and I can't do anything about it. I hate it! Ugh, I feel so strange right now. I go through this every week and have no idea how to not get upset about it. I don't like having to say goodbye to friends all the time. :(

I guess I'll just have to say hasta luego because hopefully we will meet again! For now, perhaps an after work dance party will make things a little better.

Dream big people! See see you later!

Smile and Nod

So. Patience is not my strong suit. On the plus side, I lost 9 pounds. On the down side, that seems like a very small number. It's not even 10. And it's been like, 5 weeks. And it's haaarrdddd. Baby steps I guess. I seriously need to work on the patience thing. I have zero of it and it makes my life kind of difficult.

For instance, at work. Things I have been told at work lately:

"Sometimes you look very tired. But not today, you look fresh!"

Uhh, thanks. Also, please tell me when I look very tired and I'll try to do something about that.

"I don't like your attitude."

Well guess what co-worker, I don't like when you suck at your job so you work on that and I'll work on my tude. K, thanks.

Don't worry, I didn't say that. Instead, I smiled and nodded. Best advice I have ever recieved: Smile and Nod. My mom always said that was the best way to react to idiot people. It actually works pretty well. Because, normally, stupid people are not going to change their stupid ways. There is a reason they are stupid and if they're angry or whatever their problem is and whatever they are projecting onto you, you probably can't fix. So just smile and nod and maybe they'll go away. They do sometimes! And it works better than getting angry because then you'll just have two angry people and then things get heated.

Whatever. Work is over and then I watched this and all was well:



Ellen always makes it better.

Dream big people!

When Mr. Satan Is Knocking At My Door

I answer and say, what up Satan! Come on in homeskillet. Just kidding, I never use the word homeskillet. I also have never answered the door and seen Mr. Satan standing there. The title is from an "Awesome Album Cover" Ellen found. Also, on the album, "Why Worry When You Can Pray?" Good question.

Anyway. Man, what a fan-fucking-tastic weekend! Seriously, it was so awesome. I already discussed the first half, so let's move on to the second. Saturday night in Hoolllyyywoooodddd. Actually, the club in Hollywood was super lame, until my friends and I walked in, and it instantly became cooler. I spent way to much money but that is what happens when you are feeling generous and are already drunk. Bad idea. Leaving my credit card in the car next time. But, dancing was fun and I kind of felt like I was on vacation. Love dancing. Looking forward to more this weekend!

Sunday was also a good time. It is amazing what a difference a car makes. It seriously changed my life. That, and also having someone that was willing to participate in my plans. And by that, I mean I would suggest things and my French friend agreed to them. This may or may not have been because he didn't actually understand what I was saying, but whatever. I think he had fun.

First, we went to the batting cages. I, being the avid player I am, hit ZERO balls. Him, having never ever played baseball in his entire life, hit about half. So that was pretty embarrassing. Also embarrassing, I'm sore today. So lame. I got a little redemption on the mini golf course where I stomped him, 54-63. I also noticed I need a retainer. Then I lost in ski ball and basketball. But whatever.



Sad Times



Happy Times

After sport, I dragged my friend around, decided he needed to get up close and personal with the Hollywood sign and also Griffith Observatory. It was a fantastically touristy day. I also decided he could not return to France without trying Wendy's. His goal was to try as much American fast food as possible, so I made sure he got only the best. I am pretty much the ambassador for American cuisine. You're welcome, America.

Then I took the longest way possible home and mentally prepared myself for giving up the car. It was very difficult. My only solace? All the hotties working at Enterprise in dress shirts and ties. Damn, there is nothing hotter than a man in a tie. Ok, maybe a few other things but I love when a guy looks nice.

Stopping this tangent now. Point is, it was a good weekend and I was sad to see the car go. We will meet again, automobile.

Come visit! See how LA can be:

Dream big people!

Happy Morning

I wish I felt like these goobers in the morning! I find that video hilarious and wanted to share.

It really doesn't matter what I'm doing that day, whenever I wake up, the first thing that enters my mind is something that sounds like: arougghhhafffuucckkkssshhiitttarrrggggmoorreeesleeeeppp.

Then I try to figure out how I can get out of whatever I'm doing. Usually, it's work. Every day I debate if I want to call in sick. I think I've done it twice, once I was actually sick. But, even if I'm doing the most AWESOME thing that day, I still don't want to get up. For real. The day I was going to Disneyland, I was like, shit, do I really want to do this? Then I got up, and after a few minutes, I was so excited I couldn't contain myself. It's just those first few minutes. Well, except work days. Then the feeling can last well into the morning. Sometimes all day, but usually one of the ridiculous students cheers me up at some point. Jacky, I has question. Kills me.

Speaking of AWESOME things, yesterday I went to the Dodgers game and I DROVE myself and friends there. I know we've discussed my love of driving, but shit. It is just the best. Also, the Dodger's won! And, there were FIREWORKS! And, I went with students and they were hilarious! Loved it all. EVEN when we were stuck in traffic for an hour and half and then we were almost there and someone decided to have a fair in the middle of the street. Like, there was a fucking Ferris wheel in the middle of Venice Blvd. No warning, no signs, just a Ferris wheel. Eesh.

Anyway, then today I went to an LA King's game, and that was awesome as well. Kings won! Then, Chick-Fil-A! [Very random side note: Was it always Chick-Fil-A? I swear it used to be Chic-Fil-A. Am I making this up?] More driving, loooovvveeee it. Tonight, Hollywood! Tomorrow, batting cages! Awesome, awesome, and more awesome. Seriously thinking hard about ways to rob banks so I can buy myself a car. Suggestions welcome.

One teeny tiny negative thought: BOYS ARE SO AGGRAVATING. Do NOT tease me if you have a freaking girlfriend! Boys with girlfriends should have to wear rings as well, just so you know they are limits. I mean damn. Ok, shaking that off.

Focusing on the awesome. Hope everyone's weekend has been awesome as well. If not, come visit me and I will show you how awesome weekends can be.

Dream big people!

PS-I am not doing an April Fool's Day post because AFD is of no importance to me. I HATE practical jokes and an entire day dedicated to them can kiss my ass.