Three Little Birds

Every time I freak out about something, I tend to forget that in (usually) just a few short days, everything will be ok. Yeah. I should try to remember that. I mean, I kind of do, but it's hard to focus on that and stop crying. Also, having sad things happen around the your "monthly" (sorry boys) time is really just unfortunate. I'm a cryer, in general, but around that time, it's amplified and uncontrollable sobbing starts when really just a few tears would suffice. I mean, crying in your room is one thing, but at work, while driving, at the gym, buying groceries, etc, etc i s a little much. Really, your room is the best place for crying. There, you can also make the pathetic wailing noises that make everything more dramatic but somehow also makes things a little better. I think it's just one more step in the release process. I don't know, maybe that's just me.

Anyway, this week, things are MUCH better. It's funny because, really, things have kind of started to come apart even more so than before, but I'm ok with it. I've got a new plan, I've started putting the gears into motion and I'm actually quite excited about the whole thing. It's a whole long story and I don't want to explain it all/say anything until I know a few things for sure, but I'm taking steps in the right direction and it feels good. Also, while some things are falling apart, other things are falling perfectly into place. Life is so weird.

Also, I've had some really good activities lately with really nice students and it has lifted my spirits. Having people write "Jacky is not friendly," is a little bit soul crushing at times, but can be canceled out when someone tells you otherwise. There is one student, though, that I kind of want to punch in the face. This one girl I tried SO hard with because she went on a lot of activities, but she would NEVER talk. She answered all my questions with one word and never seemed happy. Normally I'm like, whatever, when they complain, but this girl in particular really irked me because she went with me on the trip to Disneyland on my birthday. And I'm sorry, but I have never been friendlier or nicer than I was on that day. I was bursting with happiness, friendliness, and overall joy on that day. So, I just don't really understand why or how she could possibly say I was not friendly after the almost excessive amount of enthusiasm I had on that day. She's gone now, but seriously? Fuck you. Also, you have ugly stupid bangs and you, Miss one word answers, are not friendly. So there.

Moving right along, I just finished this hilarious book and I highly recommend it. I laughed out loud at multiple parts and was sad when I got to the last page. It's "A Year of Living Biblically" by AJ Jacobs and it was one of the best books I've read in a long time. The title pretty much explains it, but it's basically this guy trying to live by the Bible's rules for a year. It's so funny and some parts are touching and insightful and I really really enjoyed it. He has another about reading the entire encyclopedia, and I'm going to read that next I think. (Also, thanks Dad and Kellie for the Barnes and Noble giftcard with which I bought it!)

So that's my life now. I'm excited about the next phase, trying to enjoy the end of this one and so thankful that I have really fantastic friends here in LA. Everywhere, really, but some really great ones here. I will definitely be sad to say goodbye to them. I'll dwell on that later though.

Dream big people!