But for real! I'm trying something new. It's called live blogging. I've heard of it but I haven't really learned the logistics, so I don't know if I'm doing it right. So my version is, I'm watching Glee and making remarks about it here, for your reading pleasure. It will literally be stream of consciousness typed out while I'm watching. You are welcome!
[Afterthought: this might not make any sense unless you've seen the show and/or are watching while reading. Sorry. But it was fun for me! Also, there are commercial comments as well...they are in parantheses]
Herrreeee we go!
Whoa, what, the ex wife is back? Nooo. I don't like her.Monkey flu? That doesn't sound fun.
Ohhh, SICK!!
Best I just got sneezed on face ever! Aw, Shuesters face isn't as good.
Perks of being a high school teacher? I think not. There are none.
Aw, cute kids! Yay! The whole episode should be like that! Too bad these kids can't really act. It could have been really funny.
These two can NOT get back together. Crazy lady, STEP BACK. I don't even like Shuester that much, but I hate her. Baby talk makes me want to vomit. Bitch, don't even act like you are so great because you remember his favorite movie.
SHUT UP Rachel! Wow, I hate her sometimes! I apparently hate a lot of people.
Gay date for Kurt! Yay! "We know how lonely you've been." Ouch. I mean, they are in high school. Soo lonely. Please. Talk to me in five years.
Tater tots sound gross when they're being poured.
And yet some more hatred...sorry Gwyneth (sp?), don't like you either. You and your website is annoying.
Umm, are we serious? Conjunction junction in high school? Who are those back up singers?
You smell homeless. HAHAHAHAHA. Kurt, I love you.
Oooo, love Artie too. He thinks he's gangster. Oh, what the hell?
Holly Holiday? For reals?
Wait, Brittany might be my favorite. Field trip to Taco Bell? YES PLEASE. Medical grade marijuana? Lady, you are a teacher! Set an example.
Kurt, 80s music is fantastic. You shut your face.
Ok, really don't like when old people try to be hip. Also, Forget You is just NOT as fantastic as Fuck You. Nice try. Oooh no, you did not just do the robot.
Liking Gwyneth less and less. Not sure how that is happening. Never thought I would be on the same page as Rachel cause she is annoying as shit.
Cee-Los whiny WHHYYYS are way better.
Let's go get some Tacos! Lame. Only redeemed because Taco Bell is actually awesome.
(Vampire Weekend in a commercial! Yay! Still pissed I missed that concert.)
Athletes foot medicine comes in spray form?
Seriously, how would anyone let Sue be principal?
Beastie for the win!
Do people EVER go to class at this school?
This is clearly a dream sequence. Is Mr. Shue wearing Air Force Ones?
Walking on a piano can't be good for it. Oh, I think they are just white Chucks.
The more Asian kid dancing, the better.
I'm kind of confused now. What is going on. This is not making me laugh.
Therrrreee we go. It's a dream.
You can't understand Rachel! Hooray!
Hoarders and Red Wine doesn't sound that fun. To me.
Kurt, you better check yourself! Dissing Mercedes is not cool. Oh, and now the tots are gone. M is NOT going to be pleased. Throwing them away is so completely wasteful.
Sue just called her Ja-kay. Like the lady from Sister Sister! Yes. Not sure how you really spell that.
Richard Nixon...not sure he had the people's best interest in mind.
A toilet brush? Family of gummy bears. Awesome.
(Love and Other Drugs looks kind of lame. But I do like Oliver Platt...The Big C is so good! And Jake is soo fine. I am so bitter about him and Taylor. I refuse to believe it's real.)
(Adoraboots are super ugly.)
(Sorry American Idol, you are not going to convince me to watch you with this sappy music. My dreams are not coming true with you because I can't sing. Lame.)
(TrueMoo...good name.)
(I wonder if the LA Bank of America commercial airs everywhere or if there are different ones for all over the US. Anyone? Thoughts on this? Have you seen the LA BofA commercial?)
Miss Holiday, you cannot tell people they suck! Even if they do!
Righteous? For real? I reallllly don't like her. Un-pop that collar right now.
There are good 80s bands other than Journey, Mr. Shue.
That is a stupid catch phrase.
NOOOOOO. GET BACK DEVIL WOMAN! Shuester, NO! Do not talk about yourself in third person as a BABY. Jesus, can't handle it. DON'T take your shirt off!
Shit.
Ew, she just kissed Menthol rub. NOOOOO. Stop kissing! Ugh, I hope she gets sick and dies.
Anthony is cute! Are high school kids on Google search? Scary.
Um, yeah right. Tots revolution?
How come sometimes they eat outside and sometimes in the cafeteria?
YESSSSS! Chicago! Still hate you Gwen. But awesome robe. Even though you look like a slut. You are a TEACHER! What in the world? She's got some pretty loose morals for a high school substitute teacher.
When did they have time to learn all this? In the past hour? Doesn't she have class to teach? Doesn't Rachel have class to go to? I wonder if she is all crazy about her grades too. Maybe she would be if she ever WENT TO CLASS!
And now they have guns. Those would not be allowed. Who is their lighting guy? Glee, you are completely unbelievable. I know, it's a TV show.
The hair jokes never get old. Just kidding. They do. But his hair is pretty silly.
Noooo! Figgins got fired? Sadness.
I don't think you can arbitrarily fire teachers like that. Don't they have contracts or something?
Who cares?
(Tron looks dumb.)
(Why would a giant have a job at a grocery store? He needs to be outside.)
(I love those Puffs commercials.)
Double date! Precious. hahaha. Oh wait. Where is her date?
You want some tots? Umm, yeah, let me just whip some up at this Italian restaurant I work at. Sooo glad I'm not a waitress anymore. Dear Jesus, please don't even make me be a waitress again.
These kids feel special? Get a grip.
I tweet them about it. Stupid. So glad I'm not working in a high school.
Bitch!
Uh oh, M just got schooled. Please school H too! Yes! Berets ARE out. Tracksuits are IN!
("Total Shock" says girl engaged to Prince William. "Yeah right" says girl that should have been engaged to Prince William.)
Expensive beer...totally legit reason to drop in on people. Stop crying loser.
Cameo is totally scary. She has humongous nostrils. Sadly, a student punching a teacher is not the most unbelievable part of this show.
SHUE, you are making horrible lady choices. Don't flirt with her!
Porn star or drag queen? YES. Well, H just scored a point with me for calling Teri (Terry?) a bitch.
Sorry, Teri, you gotsa go. Don't come back. EVER. Somehow I don't think he's going to regret it. Unless she stuffs tater tots up his tail pipe.
Lacar!
Actually, I don't think they have tots in jail. I don't know though. Maybe.
Gooo get em M! Snag that Anthony.
Eesh, that jock kid is scary. I don't know how to spell his name.
Surprise! Shue gets his job back. TOTALLY didn't see that one coming. (Sike)
The under flaps of my breasts, ohhhhh my god.
The Mr. Shue love is a little excessive. Brittany for the win!
Craigslist shout out, holla! Reminder: check Missed Connections for true love.
Gin and juiicccce.
Ok, I do like bi polar rants. One point for crazy H. Only one though.
Oh yeah, no problem, we'll just cover the stage in water. Maintenance won't mind. Rain coming down in the back? Sure thing. Wasting water! This is the episode of wastefulness.
Why are the teachers singing with them? They aren't allowed to do that at sectionals. And they are like, the stars! I thought it wasn't supposed to be about them.
God, I hate that umbrella song. Make it stop.
How is their hair not getting wet at all? I would not like doing this dance. I hate when I get my feet wet when I'm wearing socks and shoes. Seriously, worst feeling ever. And it takes fooorreever to dry.
I think this wedding is going to be AWESOME. Can't wait!Annnnnnd SCENE!
Ok, um, so this is crazy long. I'm doubting most of you made it to the end. But if you did, congratulations! This was fun. I think I did it wrong, but maybe I'll make it a thing. Thoughts?
Dream big people!
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